0d8567f15f31430eaee6af69a3060499

It's not about finding more time, it's about shifting the lens

Mon, 30 Mar 2026 09:38:03 GMT

Whenever I have conversations with leaders, "lack of time" is always a frustration...no time for meaningful 121s, no time for development conversations and no time to really lead beyond the meetings, emails, and constant demands of daily work life.

And it’s true, time is limited. But what if better leadership wasn’t about finding more time, just about seeing the time you already have, differently?

There is a perception great leadership happens outside of the day job and that it requires longer meetings, extra check-ins and carefully scheduled “people time”. So when diaries are full, our leadership can slip.

But the reality is much simpler:

You are already spending the time and you are already having the conversations. The opportunity isn’t to add more…it’s to shift the way you use what’s already there.

Let's use the classic 121 as an example:

In many organisations, they are about updates, task tracking, quick problem solving...efficient? Yes. But transformational? Not even close.

Now imagine a small shift in mindset. Instead of asking: “What’s the update?” You ask: “What’s been stretching you recently?” or “Where are you feeling stuck?” or “What do you need more (or less) of from me?”

The same meeting for the same amount of time with a completely different impact.

This is where leadership gets interesting, because it’s not about grand gestures or perfectly crafted strategies.

It’s about micro-shifts:

Turning a check-in into a coaching moment
Turning a problem into a learning conversation
Turning feedback into curiosity rather than judgement

These shifts don’t require more time, they require attention, intention , and a willingness to think differently.

When you start to reframe your time, something changes. You stop asking how do I fit leadership in and start asking how do I lead within what I’m already doing?

A project update becomes a chance to build ownership, a quick chat becomes a moment of connection, a challenge becomes an opportunity for growth. Leadership stops being an extra and starts becoming part of everything.

This week, don’t add anything new to your diary; instead, pick one moment you’re already having: a 121, a team meeting, a quick check-in and ask yourself “How could I show up differently here?”

No need to find more time, just a shifting of the lens. Because often, better leadership isn’t about doing more, it’s about reframing what you are already doing.

Leading Well when the System Isn't

Mon, 02 Mar 2026 10:24:33 GMT

I've been working with a number of leadership teams over the last few months and there is one frustration they all carry. "How do I lead well when the system is working against me?"

They care about their people. They can see what would make things better. And yet the systems around them feel slow, rigid or misaligned with reality.

Policies don’t quite fit.
Processes create more work than value.
Decisions take too long.

It’s easy to feel stuck.

But even when you can’t change the system, you can change the experience of working within it. Here's how:

1. Protect your team’s energy

You might not be able to remove every process, but you can buffer your team from unnecessary noise.

Translate corporate language into something human.
Create clarity where the wider system creates confusion.
Push back constructively when something adds no value.

Your team doesn’t need a perfect organisation, they need a leader who helps them make sense of it.

2. Create a micro-culture of trust

You may not control the whole culture, but you can shape the climate in your team.

You decide whether it’s safe to speak honestly, whether feedback is normal and whether mistakes become blame or learning. Psychological safety is built in everyday interactions.

3. Model the behaviour you wish the system rewarded

If the system rewards busyness over impact or certainty over curiosity, you don’t have to reinforce that.

Admit when you don’t know.
Credit others.
Ask better questions.
Make it safe to challenge you.

Change doesn’t always start top-down, often, it spreads sideways.

4. Have the conversations others avoid

In rigid systems, difficult conversations get deferred. Strong leaders don’t wait.

They notice.
They check in.
They say the thing - clearly and respectfully.

5. Focus on influence, not frustration

You may not redesign the structure but you can ask:

What is actually in my control?
Where do I have discretion?
Who do I need to build a relationship with?

There will always be constraints, wherever you work, whatever the "system". But, leadership isn’t about waiting for perfect conditions, it’s about choosing who you will be within the imperfect ones.

Systems do matter and removing barriers is important, but it takes time to change at an organisational level.

Leadership happens in the space between policy and people.

And that space is still yours.

Why the Team You’re In Matters More Than the Team You Lead

Wed, 21 Jan 2026 15:34:23 GMT

I spend a lot of time talking about leadership as something we "do to" or "for" others.

How we motivate.
How we set direction.
How we hold people to account.

All important, of course. But there’s a quieter leadership skill that often gets overlooked. One that can make or break trust, culture and performance. It’s this: "how we show up in the team we are part of, not just the team we lead".

This is where T-shaped leadership comes into play. A T-shaped leader has:

Depth: strong expertise, credibility and ownership in their role (the vertical bar of the T)
Breadth: the ability to collaborate, understand other disciplines, and contribute beyond their remit (the horizontal bar)

In practice, this means leaders who are confident in what they bring and curious about what others bring. They don’t lead from a silo. They lead as part of a wider system.

But T-shaped leadership isn’t just about skills. It’s about mindset and behaviour, particularly when you’re not “the boss in the room”. It's the leadership test no one talks about.

Most senior leaders sit in at least two teams at the same time:

The team they lead
The peer or leadership team they are part of

And here’s the uncomfortable truth. People often put more energy into the first than the second.

In their own teams, leaders are thoughtful, encouraging, patient. In their peer team, they’re rushed, guarded, competitive or quietly disengaged. Yet the leadership team sets the tone for the whole organisation.

If trust is fragile there, it leaks everywhere. If accountability is avoided there, it becomes optional elsewhere. If collaboration is performative there, it never becomes real lower down. The team you’re in is where your leadership maturity really shows.

Why does it matter?

Your team will take their cues from how you behave with your peers, not just from what you say to them. They notice:

How you talk about other departments
Whether you take shared responsibility or retreat to “my area”
How you respond when decisions don’t go your way
Whether you challenge constructively or disengage quietly

When leaders model curiosity, respect and accountability upwards and sideways, it gives permission for others to do the same. When they don’t, no amount of values posters will fix it.

One of the most powerful mindset shifts leaders can make is this. "My role in this leadership team is not to represent my function, it’s to help this team work well.”

That changes:

How you prepare for meetings
How you listen
How you disagree
How you follow decisions once they’re made

It moves leadership from advocacy to stewardship. And it’s not always comfortable. Being T-shaped means letting go of certainty, tolerating ambiguity, and sometimes backing a decision you wouldn’t have made yourself, because the team made it together.

In complex, fast-moving environments, leadership isn’t about having all the answers, it’s about how well people think together. And perhaps most importantly, it creates leadership teams that others want to emulate not endure.

You can be a brilliant leader of your own team and still unintentionally weaken the organisation if you don’t show the same care, curiosity and accountability in the team you’re part of.

T-shaped leadership asks more of us and gives more back, because the team you’re in doesn’t just shape outcomes, it shapes the kind of organisation everyone else experiences.

Start at the Beginning: Why leadership is really about the small things

Wed, 19 Nov 2025 10:50:35 GMT

If you spend enough time with leaders, new, emerging or experienced, you might begin to notice a pattern. Most of the challenges they bring aren’t rooted in technical skill, complex strategy, or dramatic organisational change. They’re rooted in "the small things".

The conversation someone meant to have weeks ago.
The decision that stayed on the ‘I’ll sort it later’ list.
The colleague they’re worried about upsetting.
The feedback they softened to avoid discomfort.

It’s never the big, dramatic moments that shape a team. It’s the everyday choices. The “I’ll leave it for now.” The “It’s probably fine.” The “I don’t want to make it awkward.”

And that’s why, at BeanStalk, we always start at the beginning.

The beginning is: What’s really going on? Before we talk about frameworks, tools, or programmes, we go straight to the heart of it:

What’s the conversation you’re avoiding?
What assumptions are silently steering your decisions?
What are the stories you’ve told yourself that no longer serve you?
What needs to be said, kindly and clearly, so everyone can move forward?

Because leadership development isn’t about piling on more theory. It’s about getting underneath what’s already there and making it workable.

And one thing I see again and again is this belief that avoiding a difficult conversation is somehow kinder. It isn’t.

Giving someone feedback that helps them do something better, or differently, is an act of kindness. It’s an investment in their success. Holding back, softening the truth, or endlessly delaying the conversation creates uncertainty, frustration, and a quiet erosion of trust.

That’s why so much of the work we do focuses on helping managers build confidence in saying the right thing, in the right way, at the right time.

Leadership isn’t transformed through dramatic gestures. It shifts in 1% changes, consistently applied.

A quick check-in.
A moment of clarity.
A boundary set early.
A conversation that clears the air.

Small actions create movement. Movement builds momentum.

The real beginning? Trust.

Everything we do at Beanstalk is grounded in trust — trusting your people, trusting yourself, and trusting that honest, purposeful conversations move teams forward. You don’t need to be perfect. You don’t need to have all the answers. You just need to start.

One conversation.
One question.
One small shift.

Because that’s where real leadership begins.

How Conscious Leadership Can Address the Top 5 Leadership Challenges

Tue, 06 Aug 2024 08:53:13 GMT

In today's fast-paced business world, leaders are faced with a range of complex challenges.

The Center for Creative Leadership (CCL) identified the top 20 most common leadership challenges, highlighting the areas where leaders often struggle.

Let’s focus on the top five challenges and explore how Conscious Leadership - an approach rooted in awareness, empathy, and values - can provide effective solutions.

Developing Managerial Effectiveness

One of the most significant challenges for leaders is developing their own managerial effectiveness. Conscious Leadership emphasises self-awareness and continuous personal growth. By developing mindfulness and emotional intelligence, leaders can improve their decision-making abilities, better manage their time, and enhance their overall effectiveness. Conscious leaders are not only aware of their strengths and weaknesses but are also committed to ongoing learning and development, which is essential for managerial success.

Inspiring Others

Inspiration is at the heart of effective leadership. Conscious leaders inspire by being authentic, purpose-driven, and aligned with their values. They lead by example, demonstrating integrity in their actions and creating a work environment where employees feel motivated and engaged. When leaders connect deeply with their teams and communicate a clear, compelling vision, they can inspire others to achieve their best and contribute meaningfully to the organisation’s goals.

Leading a Team

Leading a team effectively requires more than just managing tasks, it involves building trust, promoting collaboration, and building a sense of belonging. Conscious leaders are skilled at creating environments where team members feel valued and supported. By encouraging open communication, listening actively, and showing empathy, they build strong, cohesive teams capable of working together towards common objectives. This approach not only enhances team performance but also improves overall job satisfaction and retention.

Guiding Change

Change is inevitable in any organisation, but guiding teams through change can be challenging. Conscious Leadership embraces change as an opportunity for growth and innovation. Leaders who practice conscious leadership are transparent and empathetic, helping their teams navigate uncertainty with confidence. They focus on creating a positive narrative around change, involving their teams in the process, and providing the support needed to adapt. This approach reduces resistance to change and develops a more resilient, adaptable workforce.

Managing Stakeholders

Effectively managing relationships with stakeholders, whether they are employees, customers, or shareholders, is crucial for success. Conscious leaders approach stakeholder management with integrity and a long-term perspective. They seek to understand the needs and concerns of all stakeholders and strive to create value that aligns with their values and mission. By building trust and having open dialogue, conscious leaders ensure stakeholder relationships are strong, positive, and mutually beneficial.

Conclusion

The challenges of developing managerial effectiveness, inspiring others, leading teams, guiding change, and managing stakeholders are among the most common and pressing issues that leaders face.

Conscious Leadership offers a powerful framework for addressing these challenges by promoting self-awareness, empathy, and values-driven decision-making. Leaders who embrace this approach not only enhance their effectiveness but also create a positive, thriving culture that can navigate the complexities of today’s business environment.

Navigating the VUCA World: Challenges and Responses for Leaders

Wed, 05 Jun 2024 10:11:04 GMT

In today's rapidly evolving world, leaders are increasingly confronted with environments characterised by Volatility, Uncertainty, Complexity, and Ambiguity (VUCA).

This concept, originating from the U.S. military, aptly describes the unpredictable nature of our current global landscape. However, as the world becomes more intricate, another framework is emerging to help leaders understand challenges: BANI, introduced by futurist Jamais Cascio.

The VUCA Landscape

Volatility refers to the speed and unpredictability of change. Markets, technologies, and societal norms can shift dramatically with little warning.
Uncertainty highlights the lack of predictability in future events. Leaders often face situations where historical data is no longer a reliable predictor of future trends.
Complexity points to the numerous interconnections and interdependencies within systems. A change in one area can have cascading effects elsewhere.
Ambiguity underscores the lack of clarity about the meaning of events. Information can be interpreted in multiple ways, making decision-making challenging.

Enter BANI: A deeper dive into these challenges

Brittle: Systems that seem robust can fail unexpectedly. For instance, the shift to remote work during the pandemic revealed that flexibility is both desired by employees and challenging for some leaders to embrace. The tension between traditional in-office work and the new norm of flexibility is palpable. While some leaders push for a return to the office, the demand for flexibility is unlikely to dissipate.
Anxious: The relentless pace of change is creating widespread anxiety and fear. By adopting a human-centred approach to leadership, emphasising empathy and understanding, leaders can mitigate anxiety and maintain morale.
Non-linear: In a non-linear world, there is no straightforward path from point A to point B. Outcomes are often unpredictable and disproportionate to inputs. Leaders need to be agile, ready to change strategies as new information emerges which demands continuous learning and the ability to adapt quickly to changing circumstances.
Incomprehensible: The sheer speed of change can make it difficult to comprehend what is happening. Leaders should remain open-minded, acknowledging they do not have all the answers. This involves showing vulnerability, seeking input from others, and making decisions with less-than-perfect information.

Navigating VUCA requires leaders to be adaptable, resilient, and visionary, embracing uncertainty and complexity, while making decisions with incomplete information and continuously reassessing their strategies.

Here are four key strategies:

Develop Empathy: Listen to employees, validate their feelings, and provide the support they need to thrive.
Cultivate Agility: Build teams and structures who can quickly adapt to changing circumstances. Encourage continuous learning and the willingness to change direction when necessary.
Promote Open-mindedness: Acknowledge the limits of your knowledge and seek diverse perspectives. Involve others in decision-making and create a culture of collaboration and innovation.
Develop Resilience: Prepare for unexpected challenges by building robust systems and contingency plans. Encourage a mindset of perseverance and continuous improvement.

Leading in a VUCA and BANI world is undeniably challenging. What worked yesterday may not work tomorrow, and the ability to adapt is paramount. By understanding the nuances of both VUCA and BANI, leaders can develop the skills and mindsets necessary to navigate uncertainty, complexity, and rapid change.

This is not about gaining more knowledge, this is about letting go and opening our minds to the possibilities so we can navigate complex situations and challenges.

The Top Three Habits of Great Leaders

Wed, 08 May 2024 13:17:08 GMT

Great leadership is an art combining various skills and attributes, but I think, there are three standout habits which make a leader truly exceptional.

These habits are not just beneficial for the leaders themselves but also for the teams they guide and the businesses they work within.

1. Collaboration with Their Teams

Great leaders know the key to success lies in the power of teamwork. They understand collaboration creates a sense of community and belonging, which in turn drives productivity and innovation. By working closely with their teams, leaders can harness diverse perspectives and skills, leading to better (and probably quicker), problem-solving with more creative solutions.

2. Continuous Learning

The world is constantly changing, and great leaders stay ahead by being lifelong learners. They are always seeking new knowledge, skills, and experiences to help them grow both personally and professionally. This commitment to continuous learning not only keeps them relevant but also inspires their teams to pursue their own learning journeys.

3. Looking After Their Own Wellbeing

Leadership is demanding, so great leaders recognise the importance of looking after themselves. They set aside time for their own wellbeing, understanding being mentally and physically healthy is more effective and can set a positive example for others. Whether it's through exercise, meditation, or simply taking time to recharge, great leaders prioritise their own health and wellbeing to maintain theirs, and their teams, performance and flexibility.

These three habits create a foundation for a thriving work environment and lead to sustained success. Practicing these habits, allows leaders to inspire their teams, drive change, and leave a lasting impression in their business.

That's a legacy I would want!

The Impact of Great Leadership: A Personal Reflection

Thu, 28 Mar 2024 15:33:38 GMT

Leadership is an art with the power to transform not just our workplaces, but our lives too. It's a blend of skills used to propel teams towards success and create environments where creativity and innovation can flourish.

Throughout my career, I've had the privilege of working under a variety of leaders, each with their own style and approach to leadership. The experiences have been varied, but it's the great leaders who have left an indelible mark on my professional and personal life.

These leaders are the ones who have exhibited patience, empathy, and vulnerability. They understood leadership was not about wielding authority, but about guiding and nurturing their team.

Patience allows leaders to give their team the time they need to learn, grow, and make mistakes. It's about providing a safe space for development without the fear of immediate repercussions.

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. In leadership, this translates to a manager who can put themselves in their team's shoes, appreciate their struggles, and celebrate their successes as if they were their own. This creates a bond of trust and respect invaluable in any team dynamic.

Vulnerability, often mistaken for a weakness, is actually a strength in great leaders. It's about being open about one's own limitations and uncertainties. When leaders show vulnerability, it humanises them, breaks down barriers, and fosters a culture of openness and honesty.

These qualities not only enhance the work environment but also encourage personal growth.

Under such leadership, I've found myself more willing to take risks, share ideas, and push beyond my comfort zone.

And the impact of these leaders has extended beyond the workplace; it has influenced how I lead my own life and interact with others. The influence of great leaders can be profound...they shape our professional paths and personal growth and they remind us leadership is not just about the end goal but how we get there, making sure we guide people along the way.

As I reflect on my experiences, I am hugely appreciative for the great leaders who have crossed my path, and inspired me to embody their best qualities in my own style and the work I do.

Leading with Empathy: Why Compassion Matters in Leadership

Wed, 06 Mar 2024 12:37:29 GMT

I was listening to the news this morning about it being pretty much a foregone conclusion that Trump and Biden will be the two candidates in the US Presidency Elections. I'm not one for debating politics, but neither of them inspire me particularly as leaders, and if I were living in the US, I would vote for neither.

So, what is it that makes a great leader? Their charisma, their vision, their skills, or something else? While all of these factors are important, there is one quality that stands out above the rest: Empathy .

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It's not a nice-to-have, but a crucial skill for effective leadership.

Empathy helps leaders to connect with their teams, to inspire them, to motivate them, and to support them. Empathy helps leaders to make better decisions, to resolve conflicts, and to foster a positive culture.

But how can we develop empathy in our leadership roles? Here are five practical tips:

Listen actively. One of the best ways to show empathy is to listen attentively and respectfully to what others have to say. Without interruption, judgement or assumption. Just listen and try to understand their perspective, their emotions, and their needs. One of Stephen Covey's "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" is seek first to understand before being understood. In a nutshell, what's important to one person may seem trivial to you but you'll never know why if you don't listen or dismiss their point of view.
Ask open-ended questions. Ask questions that invite others to share more about themselves and their situations. Open-ended questions start with "what", "how", "when", "where", "tell me more", explain to me" or "describe to me". It seems so simple when written down, but is more tricky in practice because we have an "Advice Monster" wanting to take over the conversation and share everything we know about something. Resisting the temptation, may lead you somewhere neither of you expected.
Express appreciation. Recognising others efforts, acknowledging their contributions, and celebrating their achievements can go a long way in building trust and rapport. Filling up the emotional bank account makes it much easier when you want to have a conversation about something needing to be different or better. You are withdrawing from a healthy emotional balance rather than one in overdraft.
Show vulnerability. Share your own feelings and experiences with others, and admit to your mistakes, your challenges, your fears, or your doubts. Then you can all learn together how to move things forward. None of us are perfect or have all the answers - by showing your human side, you can create a safe space for others to do the same.
Take action. The ultimate way to show empathy is to take action to benefit others. Show you care by checking in on those who might have other things going on; inside or outside of work. Offer help and support where you can & lead by example: if you talk about being inclusive and then rarely let anyone share their ideas - you are not role modelling. If you insist everyone is in the workplace all the time and then don't show up yourself, you are not role modelling. If you give feedback and refuse to listen when others give it to you, you are not role modelling - I think you get the gist?!

Providing resources, offering support, or making changes, based on the needs of your team will make a positive difference. Empathy is not a weakness, it is a strength. And embracing it will make you a more effective, influential, and compassionate leader.

Top five action leaders need to take to build a successful hybrid team

Wed, 21 Feb 2024 15:05:03 GMT

As the tension grows between employees wanting the flexibility of working from home versus employers wanting a full return to the office, the debate continues as to why.

Cynical me might say "it's because managers don't feel like they are in control" or "we have huge office buildings sitting empty"

More objective me, thinks managers and leaders don't feel they have the skills to look after the complexities of managing a hybrid team so they'd much rather see everyone face to face so they know for sure what's going on.

To make yourself feel more comfortable, because there are a dozen reasons why hybrid works better for employees, there are five key actions you can take, and they all sit under the title of building trust.

Trust is crucial for team cohesion, relationships and productivity, regardless of where you work, but even more so when you don't physically see your team every day.

You can build trust by:

Scheduling regular team meetings - probably every week to start and then you can work out as a team how to move forward. Sales teams I've worked with in the past, would have a call every Friday afternoon to celebrate successes, tackle any challenges and close off the week.

Setting clear expectations - being really clear about everyone's roles, responsibilities, and goals means everyone knows what’s expected, and it's much easier to hold each other to account. Celebrate achievements, and address any performance gaps promptly. If you don't already, plan in 121s with everyone on a regular basis...these don't have to be formal video calls, the phone can still do a good job!

Using the tech that works best for you - it might be Slack or Teams or Google docs or SharePoint - it doesn't matter which one you choose as long as it allows for easy collaboration and communication between everyone; something everyone can see and access every day.

Communicating well and often - be clear, transparent, and accessible. Regular check-ins, team meetings, and open channels of communication help bridge the gap created by not seeing everyone every day.

Paying more attention to everyone's wellbeing - the flexibility of hybrid work can blur boundaries between personal and professional life. Be empathetic, encourage breaks, promote a work-life fit, and provide support when needed.

Above all else, model the behaviours you want to see .

Want everyone to check-in at the team meeting on a Friday afternoon? Avoid frequent reschedules
Want people to use the tech and share their updates? Make sure you do too
Want your team to feel like they are trusted? Keep the focus on outcomes rather than input

I could go on!

There is nothing new or different here...it might take a bit more effort, energy or focus to get it right for you and your team but it'll settle - just like it did when everyone was in the office all the time.

What happens when we want to learn something new?

Thu, 25 Jan 2024 10:49:34 GMT

Have you ever tried to learn a new skill and felt frustrated by how hard it was? Maybe you wanted to learn to drive, speak a foreign language, or you've stepped into a leadership role.

You might have thought you just lacked talent or motivation, but the truth is you were probably going through a natural stage of learning called " unconscious incompetence ".

Unconscious incompetence is the first of four stages in the learning cycle, according to a model developed by psychologist Noel Burch back in the 1970's - but it still makes a lot of sense today.

It means you don't know what you don't know. You are unaware of the skills or knowledge you need to master, and you may overestimate your abilities or underestimate the difficulty of the task. Like getting into a car for the first time and realising there are a million buttons, pedals, mirrors, and skills to avoid other drivers to master! This can lead to frustration, disappointment, or even giving up.

The good news is it doesn't have to be a permanent state. When you become aware of what you don't know, you can seek feedback and guidance and you move into " conscious incompetence ". You realise driving is not as easy as it looks, but it is possible with effort and practice. Your mistakes turn into opportunities to improve, rather than failures and you start to learn.

The third stage is " conscious competence " , which is when you can perform the skill or task with some degree of success, but you still need to think about it and pay attention. You may need to follow rules or instructions or rely on external cues. You are not yet fluent or confident, but you are making progress and achieving your goals. You are probably ready to take your driving test.

The final stage is " unconscious competence ". This happens when you can perform the skill or task effortlessly and automatically. You don't need to think about it or particularly concentrate on it. You have internalised the knowledge and skills, and they become part of your intuition and habits. You can perform at a high level of proficiency and creativity. But beware complacency! We can still have accidents, even if we’ve been driving for years!

So, how can you help yourself get through unconscious incompetence?

- Remember it is normal and temporary. It is not a sign of lack of talent or intelligence, but a natural part of the learning process. Everyone goes through it at some point, and it is not something to be ashamed of or to avoid.

- Seek feedback and guidance from experts or peers. They can help you identify your strengths and weaknesses and point out the gaps in your knowledge or skills. They can also provide you with useful tips, resources, or strategies to improve your learning.

- Set realistic and specific goals for yourself. Don't expect to master a skill or task overnight or compare yourself to others who are more advanced than you. Instead, focus on your own progress and achievements, and celebrate your small wins along the way.

- Practice deliberately and consistently. Practice makes perfect, but not all practice is equal. You need to practice in a way that challenges you and pushes you out of your comfort zone. You also need to practice regularly and frequently, to reinforce your learning and prevent forgetting.

- Learn from your mistakes and failures. They are not something to be feared or avoided, but rather opportunities to learn and grow. Instead of being discouraged by them, analyse them and learn from them. What went wrong? What can you do better next time? How can you prevent them from happening again?

The learning cycle is not linear or fixed. You may go through different stages for different aspects of the same skill or task, or you may regress to a previous stage if you encounter new challenges or lose practice.

The important thing is to be aware of where you are in the cycle, and what you need to do to move forward.

Learning is a lifelong journey, and unconscious incompetence is just the beginning.

Top 3 leadership trends for 2024 (and how to develop them)

Mon, 08 Jan 2024 16:29:46 GMT

Keeping up with the latest trends needed as a leader is one of the best ways to refresh your own knowledge and skills.

According to Forbes, there are three leadership trends for 2024 you should be paying attention to:

Prioritise transparency:

In a world where information is ever more abundant and accessible, leaders need to be honest and open with their teams, customers, and stakeholders. Transparency builds trust, credibility, and loyalty, which are essential for long-term success. Make sure you are communicating clearly and frequently (the good, the bad and the ugly), share your vision and goals, admit mistakes, and solicit feedback.

Look out for how your team are feeling:

The pandemic has shown us how important mental health is for our well-being and productivity. It's important you take as much care of your own mental health as you do your teams, so set healthy boundaries, promote a positive work culture, offer flexible work arrangements, and provide resources and support for mental health issues.

Cultivate adaptability and resilience:

The world is changing faster than ever. Do 5 year plans still exist? Leaders need to be able to adapt to new challenges and opportunities and be able to deal well with setbacks and failures. Embrace change, learn new skills, experiment with new ideas, seek feedback, and celebrate successes.

If you want to develop your skills, here are some of the activities you could consider adding to your development plan:

Communication - Having good communication skills is key for transparency, championing mental health, and being adaptable. You need to be able to express yourself clearly, listen actively, ask questions, and use different channels and formats to communicate effectively. How about signing up for some internal comms training, chatting to your marketing team or learning how to coach?

Build your emotional intelligence - Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions and those of others. It helps you build trust, empathy, and rapport with your team, customers, and stakeholders. It also helps you cope with stress, anxiety, and uncertainty. Reflection is a great tool to develop awareness of yourself and the impact you have on those around you. Think about what has gone well and why along with what could have been different or better and why. Make a note of what you might do differently next time.

Creativity & Collaboration skills - Creativity is the ability to generate new and useful ideas to solve problems or create value. Add collaboration into the mix and you're opening up the possibilities for solutions. Not only might you get a better solution, you'll be fostering a culture of curiosity, experimentation, and learning amongst your team and peers. In a team meeting, share an issue and ask everyone to write down four different ways to solve it...you'll get common themes to discuss or the one surprising solution, no-one had ever thought of before.

You can add all three to your development plan but do start with at least one - as leaders, learning should never stop!

How developing your coaching skills can inspire creativity and innovation in the workplace

Wed, 06 Dec 2023 11:26:35 GMT

Creativity and innovation are essential for any organisation wanting to thrive in the current competitive and ever-changing market.

But how can you create such a culture within your teams?

Well, using your coaching skills is a great place to start for all the following reasons:

First and foremost, you will encourage diversity...diversity of experience, background and thinking. Diversity is one of the key drivers for creativity and innovation, because it brings different perspectives, and skills to the discussion. When an issue presents itself, giving people the opportunity to figure out how best to deal with it creates an environment where collaboration and learning are valued.

This in turn gives autonomy. Autonomy is the freedom to choose how to do your work, and it can boost motivation, satisfaction, and creativity. Setting clear boundaries and expectations is important, but letting your team decide how to achieve a particular outcome, allows them to experiment with different approaches, tools, and methods. Just make sure to support their decisions over stepping in and giving them your answer – this is not using your coaching skills!

The more autonomy people have, the more challenging and stretching their work becomes and this breeds creativity and innovation. Challenging your team with meaningful and stimulating tasks require them to think differently and will probably lead to novel solutions.

By asking what resources and support they need, you are offering your support without micromanaging or interfering with their process…use your coaching skills to agree the goal and give them the space to think through how they might achieve it.

And then, recognize and reward the teams’ efforts, not just their results. Give them clear, specific and timely feedback, praise them publicly (if that’s what they like), and offer them incentives such as bonuses, or learning opportunities or just lunch!

And finally, role model all of the above – in other words, be seen to be doing the same things. Show you value creativity and innovation by being open to new ideas, taking risks, and learning from failures. Share your own creative process and challenges and celebrate your successes and those of others.

In the words of Albert Einstein, “Creativity is intelligence having fun” and when we let go of the need to control, a key coaching skill, innovation inevitably happens.

The Seven Attributes of Extraordinary Leadership

Thu, 09 Nov 2023 15:52:53 GMT

With the Chartered Management Institute's research showing the immense cost of ineffective leadership, (c£19bn in the UK), it felt like a good time to share what I consider to be the seven attributes of extraordinary leadership.

SIRVACE© includes the qualities that make a leader stand out from the crowd and inspire others to follow them.

Here's a sneak peek into each of these attributes and how they can help you level up your leadership game, whether you're leading a team, a project, or an organisation.

You don't have to master all of them all at once either, you can start with the ones that suit you best.

Remember, these attributes are not fixed or static. They will evolve as you grow as a leader and as your team changes. That's why it's important to keep practicing and adapting to different situations and people.

You'll start to notice how your team becomes more engaged, productive, and happy. And you'll get more recognition and respect from your peers and bosses. You'll be the leader everyone wants to work with!

Here's the breakdown of each attribute: SIRVACE©

Self-aware: This is the foundation of any good leader. Being self-aware means knowing yourself well: your strengths, weaknesses, values, motivations, emotions, and blind spots. It also means being aware of how others perceive you and how you impact them. When you're self-aware, you can leverage your strengths, work on your weaknesses, align your actions with your values, manage your emotions effectively, and adjust your behaviour according to the situation and the people around you.

Inclusive: This is the key to building diverse and high-performing teams. Being inclusive means respecting and valuing everyone's differences: their backgrounds, perspectives, opinions, preferences, and needs. It also means creating a culture of belonging where everyone feels welcome, accepted, and appreciated for who they are and what they bring to the table. When you're inclusive, you can tap into the collective intelligence and creativity of your team, foster collaboration and innovation, and avoid conflicts and misunderstandings.

Role model: This is the essence of leading by example. Being a role model means setting high standards for yourself and others: in terms of ethics, professionalism, quality, and results. It also means demonstrating the behaviours and attitudes you expect from your team: such as honesty, integrity, accountability, curiosity, and resilience. When you're a role model, you can inspire trust and loyalty from your team, motivate them to perform at their best, and influence them positively.

Vulnerable: This is the secret to building authentic and meaningful relationships. Being vulnerable means showing your human side: your emotions, doubts, fears, mistakes, and failures. It also means being open to feedback, learning from others, asking for help when needed, and admitting when you don't know something or when you're wrong. When you're vulnerable, you can connect with your team on a deeper level, build trust and rapport, and create a safe space where everyone can be themselves and share their ideas and concerns without fear of judgement or criticism.

Accountable: This is the mark of taking ownership and responsibility for your actions and outcomes. Being accountable means setting clear goals and expectations for yourself and others, and following through on them. It also means measuring and tracking your progress and results, and celebrating your successes and learning from your failures. When you're accountable, you can drive performance and improvement in your team, deliver on your promises and commitments, and earn respect and credibility from your stakeholders.

Curiosity: This is the fuel for learning and growth as a leader. Being curious means having an open mind and a thirst for knowledge. It also means asking questions, seeking feedback, exploring new ideas and opportunities, and challenging assumptions and status quo. When you're curious, you can expand your horizons and skills as a leader, encourage innovation and creativity in your team, and adapt to changing needs and demands in the market.

Enabler: This is the art of empowering and developing others. Being an enabler means providing support, guidance, and resources to your team to help them achieve their goals and potential. It also means delegating tasks and authority, giving autonomy and flexibility, and coaching and mentoring. When you're an enabler, you can boost the confidence and competence of your team, increase their engagement and satisfaction, and build a pipeline of future leaders.

The world needs more extraordinary leaders willing to make a difference in themselves and to others...even if it's just to make a dent in the £19bn by being more effective!

NB: I'm in the process of creating a questionnaire to help you identify your own strengths and areas where you can improve. Based on the results, you can create your own development plan and focus on the attributes that matter most to you so you can experiment with different tools, techniques, and activities to find what works best for you.

Seven ways to successfully lead a hybrid team

Mon, 16 Oct 2023 14:02:17 GMT

The debate continues around hybrid working, with some companies embracing the different ways to work and others refusing to entertain it. While one size does not fit all, there are ways to lead a remote or hybrid team well, without impacting your business.

Here are my top 7:

1. Communicate clearly and (more) frequently

Communication is crucial for any team, but even more so for a hybrid one. You need to make sure that everyone is on the same page, has access to the same information, and feels included and valued. Using various communication tools, such as email, chat, video calls, and project management software, helps to keep everyone updated and connected. Diarise regular check-ins and feedback sessions with your team members, and make sure they have the opportunities to interact with each other as well.

2. Set clear expectations and goals

Another important aspect of leading a hybrid team is to set clear expectations and goals for your team members, both individually and collectively. Define what you expect from them in terms of work quality, productivity, availability, collaboration, and communication. Align your team's goals with the company's vision and mission, and make sure that everyone understands how their work contributes to the bigger picture. Track and measure your team's progress and performance, dealing with those who miss the mark and celebrating their achievements.

3. Foster trust and accountability

Trust is essential for any team, but it can be harder to build and maintain in a hybrid setting. You need to trust that your team members are doing their best work, whether they are in the office or at home. You also need to create a culture of accountability, where everyone takes responsibility for their actions and results. To foster trust and accountability, you need to be transparent, honest, supportive, and respectful with your team members. Give them autonomy and flexibility to manage their own work, but also provide guidance and feedback when needed.

4. Embrace diversity and inclusion

A hybrid team brings the gift of diversity in terms of backgrounds, skills, perspectives, and preferences. This can be a great asset for your team, as it can enhance creativity, innovation, and problem-solving. However, it can also pose some challenges, such as misunderstandings, conflicts, or biases. To embrace diversity and inclusion in your hybrid team, you need to respect and appreciate everyone's differences, promote a sense of belonging and community, and ensure equal opportunities and access for all.

5. Support your team's well-being

Working in a hybrid team can have some benefits for your team's well-being, such as more flexibility, autonomy, and life balance. However, it can also have some drawbacks, such as isolation, stress, or burnout. To support your team's well-being, you need to be empathetic, compassionate, and attentive to their needs. Encourage them to take breaks, set boundaries, and prioritise their health and happiness. Provide them with the resources and tools they need to work effectively and comfortably. Recognise their efforts and achievements, and show them that you care.

6. Leverage technology and tools

Technology and tools are essential for leading a hybrid team successfully. They can help you communicate, collaborate, coordinate, and streamline your work processes. However, not all technology and tools are created equal. You need to choose the ones that suit your team's needs, preferences, and goals and train your team members on how to use them properly and securely. And you need to be mindful of the potential challenges that technology can bring, such as technical issues or distractions.

7. Be flexible and adaptable

Last but not least, leading a hybrid team requires flexibility and adaptability. You need to be able to adjust your leadership style, strategies, and practices according to the changing needs and situations of your team members. You also need to be open to feedback, learning opportunities, and new ideas from your team members. And you need to be prepared for any challenges or opportunities that may arise in the hybrid work environment.

Now, I don't know about you, but when I look at this list, there is nothing on here a good leader wouldn't be doing if their team were sitting in front of them...maybe working with a hybrid team, just takes a little more time and effort.

The cost of poor leadership

Fri, 22 Sep 2023 11:27:49 GMT

Poor leadership is a big problem in the UK.

According to a report by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development, (OECD), it costs the economy c£84 billion a year in lost productivity, lower quality, and higher turnover.

That's equivalent to 8% of the UK's GDP!

So, what can be done to improve the situation? Here are some tips on where to start:

Invest in, and champion, training and development

You need to develop your skills and knowledge to lead your team effectively, motivate them, communicate clearly, and resolve conflicts. Keep up with the latest trends and best practices in your industry and beyond. A good manager is always learning and growing.

Provide feedback and recognition

Give, and ask for, regular feedback, whether it be developmental or motivational. Recognising and rewarding good performance, celebrating achievements, and showing appreciation builds up the emotional bank account, boosting morale, engagement, and loyalty.

Delegate and empower

Stop micromanaging and trying to control every aspect of your team's work. Trust your teams to do their jobs well, give them autonomy and responsibility, and support them when they need help. This will foster a culture of innovation, creativity and problem-solving.

Communicate and collaborate

Communicate clearly and frequently with your team, your peers, and your stakeholders. Share information, goals, expectations, and feedback to encourage collaboration and teamwork, both within and across teams. This will improve efficiency, quality, and customer satisfaction.

Lead by example

Live by, and demonstrate the behaviours and values you want to see in your team. This will inspire trust, respect, and loyalty.

This list isn’t complete, but it is a good place to start. Poor leadership is not inevitable or irreversible, it can be changed with some effort, investment, and support...which will cost you far less than the cost of missed deadlines, poor quality work and constantly recruiting.

And the benefits are worth it: happier employees, happier customers, and a healthier bottom line!

Why you should make time for your own development

Tue, 22 Aug 2023 14:01:58 GMT

One of the most common challenges I hear from people is they don't have enough time for their own development.

They will only attend (reluctantly), what they are told they have to.

But, investing in your own development is not only beneficial for you, but also for the people around you. Most of us learnt to walk because we wanted to reach things we couldn't before or to feed our curiosity or because whoever was looking after us, refused to pick us up anymore! So give yourself a reason to learn something new and different.

And if you are always talking to your team about the importance of development, learning new skills, keeping fresh in their roles...then you need to role model the behaviour, otherwise you end up with an ever growing say/do gap and maybe resentment.

Here are some of the reasons why you should make time for your own development, and some tips on how to do it.

Why you should make time for your own development:

You will become more competent. Learning new things, overcoming challenges, and achieving goals will boost your knowledge and skills, and you will feel more credible and capable of handling whatever is thrown at you.

You will discover new opportunities and possibilities. By expanding your networks and learning with, and from, other people, you will expose yourself to new ideas, perspectives, and experiences. Some will work for you and some won't, but you are giving yourself choices

You will be more open to change and innovation, and you will be more likely to spot and seize opportunities which align with your interests and values. It's an old quote but a goodie:

"If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got" Tony Robbins

You will increase your value and impact. By developing your skills and knowledge, you will enhance yours, and your teams, performance and productivity. You will be able to contribute more and open up the possibilities of working with others who value continuous learning and improvement.

Learning is one of the most rewarding and satisfying human activities. It stimulates your curiosity, creativity, wellbeing, and passion. It also helps you cope with stress, boredom, and frustration. By pursuing your own development, you will enrich your life with meaning and purpose.

How to make time for your own development:

Set clear and realistic goals. Think of the last time you really wanted to learn something new...maybe it was learning to drive or maybe gaining a qualification. Then ask yourself why you wanted to learn and what did those learning experiences give me? Before you start learning anything, you need to know what you want to learn, why you want to learn it, and how you will measure your progress. Having clear and realistic goals will help you stay focused, motivated, and accountable.

Schedule regular learning sessions. If we only had one driving lesson every few years, there would be no drivers on the road! Well, there would certainly be less! So, most of us would have made time every week for a lesson. We made it a priority and it became something we did every week, not something we had to find time for. Scheduling time in our diaries every week to learn something new works the same way - it becomes protected time and forms a habit over time.

Choose the right learning methods and resources. There are many ways to learn new things; reading books or articles, watching videos or podcasts, taking online courses or workshops, joining communities or groups, or hiring coaches or mentors or just having a conversation with someone. Choose the methods and resources to suit you, your preferences, and budget

Apply what you learn as soon as possible. Learning is not just about acquiring information, but also about using it in real situations. Applying what you learn will help you reinforce your memory, deepen your understanding, and improve your skills. It will also give you feedback on what works and what doesn't, so you can adjust your learning accordingly. Let's stay with learning to drive for a moment. Practicing in between lessons helps to commit the skills to memory and concentrate more on what is happening around you to become a better "driver" over someone who can operate a car

Remember the power of "yet". The power of yet is a simple but powerful idea. Even if you don't know something or can't do something right now, you can learn it or improve it in the future. It's a way of thinking to encourage growth and resilience. Instead of saying "I can't do this", you say "I can't do this yet ". This small, but powerful word shifts your mindset, and helps you overcome challenges and setbacks

Celebrate your achievements and share your learnings. Learning is more fun and rewarding when you celebrate your achievements and share your learnings with others. Celebrating your achievements will boost your confidence and motivation. Sharing your learnings will help you consolidate your knowledge, gain new insights, and inspire others.

Making time for your own development is not a luxury, but a necessity. It is one of the best investments you can make for yourself and for the people around you. So don't wait any longer - seek opportunities rather than waiting to be told.

Coaching - the lessons I've learnt

Thu, 27 Jul 2023 15:22:28 GMT

I've worked in the HR environment for a long time; nearly 20 years in an employed role and 4 years self-employed and coaching has always been one of my preferred tools for engaging and empowering people to take responsibility for their own learning.

The role of a coach is to give you the time and space to think something through, sometimes challenging the inner voice that might be getting in the way, or assumptions you might be making. To keep you focussed without distraction on getting somewhere you weren't before with your thoughts, actions or behaviours. To untangle and make sense of your thoughts.

In employed roles, everyone knew who I was, so if I asked a clunky question or got lost a little in the conversation, it didn't matter too much. However, when self-employed, until the relationship is built, these things aren't quite so easily forgiven!

I talk a lot about continuous learning and development, it's what I love, so I should lead by example right?

Back in February, I enrolled myself on a coaching programme, to develop my own skills with the aim of being able to support and guide better than I had done before.

It's been a hugely beneficial programme and I still have two modules left to complete. Along the way, there has been confirmation of what I was doing right, recognition of some bad habits and incorporation of new knowledge.

Holding silence is a key skill for a coach and I'm pleased to say, I'm pretty good at this. What has tripped me up is my own thinking preference. I speak to think - it's part of my personality so I gather my thoughts out loud before asking you the next question...which can be distracting for you. I have some great new questions up my sleeve for when we might just need to take a breath and recentre, and the refreshers on theory and models are great; I'm seeing them through other people's eyes and that is bringing me a fresh perspective too.

So why am I telling you all this? Because there is no fairy dust or silver bullet or magic wand that will instantly change the way you think, feel or behave; it takes time, practice and reflection to start to see a difference.

And because we should never get complacent about the knowledge and skills we have - we can always learn more, be better and be different. I thought I was a pretty good coach but now I get to be a great one.

Will AI become the place we go to for learning?

Mon, 26 Jun 2023 14:25:21 GMT

There is a lot of debate at the moment about artificial intelligence apps and whether having and using them will destroy humanity and take away our jobs.

Personally, I think (with no ability to predict the future), no. AI is a great tool for enhancing our knowledge, and saving us time. I also believe, currently, you need to have a certain level of knowledge yourself to be able to use AI well.

But can it support learning? Well, I asked Bing AI, because the queue for ChatGPT is long! Here's the response:

"AI can help us learn new skills, improve our understanding, and personalize our education. Here are some examples of how AI can support learning:

AI can create adaptive learning systems that tailor the content and pace of instruction to each learner's needs and preferences. This way, learners can learn at their own speed and level, and get feedback and guidance along the way. For example, Khan Academy uses AI to provide personalized learning paths for students based on their goals and progress. Duolingo uses AI to adapt the difficulty and content of language lessons to each learner's level and interests.

AI can provide intelligent tutoring systems that simulate human tutors and offer personalized instruction and feedback. These systems can help learners master complex concepts and skills, and provide hints and explanations when they get stuck. For example, Socratic uses AI to help students with homework problems by providing step-by-step solutions and videos. Codecademy uses AI to teach coding skills by giving interactive exercises and feedback.

AI can generate new content and questions based on the learner's goals and interests. This can help learners explore new topics and domains, and challenge themselves with different types of problems and tasks. For example, Quizlet uses AI to create personalized study sets and flashcards for learners based on their subjects and courses. OpenAI Codex uses AI to generate code snippets based on natural language queries.

AI can analyze the learner's progress and performance, and provide insights and recommendations. This can help learners identify their strengths and weaknesses, set goals and plans, and monitor their learning outcomes. For example, Coursera uses AI to provide learners with personalized feedback and suggestions based on their course performance. Edmodo uses AI to help teachers track student progress and engagement.

As you can see, AI can support learning in many ways, and make it more engaging, effective, and enjoyable. Of course, AI is not a substitute for human teachers or peers, but rather a tool that can enhance and complement their roles."

All of the above will allow L&D professionals to achieve what has been almost unattainable until now, unless you have the budget to invest in expensive platforms and technology - tailored learning opportunities for every individual.

Imagine being given content specifically curated for you, based on what you already know? You can enhance your strengths and fill any gaps in your knowledge/skills knowing all the content will be relevant to you.

I don't yet know how this would work - I'm neither clever or wise enough but I can learn more. It does, however, feel like a huge step in the right direction to increasing the impact of learning.

Will it replace the need for workshops? I think not, especially if those sessions are to support people develop and practice behaviours. One of the biggest advantages of working together in a training session is hearing about everyone else's experiences, triumphs and tribulations - which AI can't give you on it's own.

So, will AI replace learning and development? No. Will it enhance your learning experience? Most definitely...

Top 5 ways to improve leadership

Fri, 26 May 2023 12:21:06 GMT

Leadership skills and styles will send ripples throughout the entire business, influencing everything from retention and culture to the bottom line. Getting the right skills and learning to adapt those skills, dependant on the person or situation in front of you, is critical to business growth and success.

These are my top five:

- 1 - Develop emotional intelligence:

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions, as well as being able to empathise, and communicate effectively, with others. Understanding your emotions and your triggers are the foundation of better leadership. Building your self-awareness and the impact you have on those around you will lead to better relationships, communication, and decision making

- 2 - Strike a balance between tactical and strategic thinking:

Tactical thinking is when you make decisions around the actions you are going to take to achieve your goals in the short term - the day-to-day stuff. Strategic thinking creates your vision and direction by which you set your goals in the long term and supports the decisions you have to make every day. Spending all your time in the tactical space will mean stuff gets done but nobody will know why (including you!). Spending all your time in the strategic thinking space may mean you have a great vision but no idea how to get there. If you don't know, your team won't know either.

- 3 - Learn how to coach:

Coaching is a skill every leader should have. It's the best way to empower your team to make their own decisions, leaving you more time to focus on your own role. It sounds simple right, but there are other skills you need to have to be a good coach - being an active listener, asking good, thoughtful questions, giving (and accepting) feedback and letting go of the need to know all the answers. If you coach, rather than tell, you'll be promoting future focus and collaboration within your team and beyond.

- 4 - Learn how to give and receive feedback:

Creating the psychological safety for everyone to give and receive feedback enables both growth and improvement. It helps build trust and rapport, is motivational and gives everyone the opportunity to perform better, supporting their development and helping to avoid conflicts. And when you are open to receiving it, you can identify your strengths and where you might need to adapt to meet the needs and expectations of your team.

- 5 - Learn to lead through change:

Even though we deal with change every day pretty much, it can be scary and stressful when we aren't in control of it. Your responsibility, as a leader, is to communicate the vision (the why), the goals (the how), and the actions (the what), of the change. If you've nailed the first four on the list you'll know exactly how to support, challenge and coach your team through it. Add role modelling the changes you want to see in others, into the mix and it might just be smoother than you were expecting.

Having the right leadership skills and knowing when to use and adapt them is critical to making your business even more successful.

What advice would you give to other leaders? I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences. In the meantime, find out how I can help.

Coaching Myths busted

Wed, 24 May 2023 14:45:28 GMT

There's a spectrum to learning with teaching at one end and coaching at the other. Teaching is when a subject matter expert tells you their knowledge to help you learn something new. Your teacher will usually have a particular area or topic they are qualified in, for example: history, law, mechanics, engineering etc...

Coaching is when you are the subject matter expert and the coach gives you the time and space for thinking, asking the occasional great question along the way. The coach is qualified to help you uncover your answers.

It is a powerful, yet often underrated, tool for personal and professional change. But there are a lot of misconceptions about what coaching involves and who it is for. These are my top five myths and their truths:

Myth #1: Coaching is telling you what to do or giving you advice.

Truth: This couldn't be further from the truth! Coaching is about asking you powerful questions to help you gain clarity, insight, and awareness. It's about listening to you deeply, and reflecting back to you what you say and how you say it. Coaching is about supporting you in finding your own answers and solutions, and giving you the accountability to take action.

Myth #2: Coaching is expensive and only for the senior team.

Truth: Anybody can access coaching. Yes, there are coaches out there who charge a hefty fee or those who will only work with senior people but there are others who are more affordable and who want to spread the gift of coaching to all. And there is a high return on your investment, because you are in control of the conversation and the outcomes and you have the choice whether to do something better or try something different. Be that finding a new job, starting a new hobby, building a relationship...the list is endless!

Myth #3: Coaching is only for people who have problems or need fixing.

Truth: Coaching is for anyone who wants to improve their performance, achieve their goals, or make positive changes in their life. Coaching is not therapy or counselling, and it doesn't focus on the past or the problems. Coaching is forward-looking and solution-oriented, and it helps you tap into your own potential and resources.

Myth #4: Coaching is a one-time event or a quick fix.

Truth: Well, it can be a one time conversation but never a quick fix. More often than not, c oaching is a process and a journey which takes time and commitment. It certainly won't solve all your problems overnight. With the right coach, you form a partnership built on trust, and that relationship brings continuous learning, growth and change which can have lasting results.

Myth #5: Coaching is only for personal or professional development.

Truth: Coaching can be applied to any aspect of your life where you want to make a positive change or achieve a specific goal. Coaching can help you find your balance across different areas of your life, be that health, relationships, finances, hobbies, spirituality, fun, wellbeing etc..., it can help you clarify where you want to get to, overcome obstacles, and create an action plan.

And finally, two truths about your coaching relationship:

Find the right fit for you - we can't like everyone or feel comfortable talking to just anyone, so find a coach who you connect with.
You are in control - if your coach is doing all the talking, or constantly interrupting, you need a new coach!

What skills do I need to be a great leader?

Wed, 26 Apr 2023 10:41:13 GMT

Leadership is so much more than having a title or a position of authority. It is about inspiring and motivating those around you to be better or different every day. And there is no dark art or mystery involved, there are skills which can be learned and improved with practice.

These are my top three; skills which are essential for becoming a great leader.

1. Emotional intelligence:

We have to start here. Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage our own emotions and those of others. Developing your emotional intelligence allows you to build trust, develop rapport, and build relationships. On the flip side, being able to recognise our emotions and why we are experiencing them, gives us a better ability to cope with stress, frustration, and to deal with conflict. If you are familiar with Transactional Analysis, it keeps us in our Adult Ego state - where objectivity and accountability reign.

2. Communication:

Being able to communicate well is key to any successful relationship, and leadership is no exception. But it's such a big word and can often get confused with the medium we use rather than the skills we have to deliver it. Good communication is clear, simple and easily understood by everyone who hears, sees or reads it. Once received, knowing how to listen to the response with all your attention is paramount and then being skilled at giving, and open to receiving, feedback comes into play.

3. Adaptability & Collaboration:

Okay, so I've squeezed two skills into one, but I don't believe you can be adaptable without collaboration and vice versa. U nderstanding change is inevitable, means we need to be flexible and adaptable to cope with it. Having a growth mindset, allows us to embrace change and see it as an opportunity for learning and growth, rather than a threat or a challenge. And if we can embrace it, we can help others adapt to change by providing guidance, support, and resources.

But, we aren't superhuman, despite what history and legacy tells us, and we can't, and shouldn't, do everything on our own. We need help, support and input from others. This may be from our teams, our peers, our bosses or maybe from networking groups, mentors, coaches - there are many places to find the support you need and people to collaborate with.

The list of skills is much longer than 3 for sure, but if we can hone these ones, we are in a great place to start to develop the others...it just takes time with practice, feedback and reflection.

Bringing your Human into Leadership

Thu, 06 Apr 2023 14:21:28 GMT

Being able to BE who you are in the workplace without having to put on a mask and pretend, creates a much better environment to work in, because showing up as someone else is exhausting!

In my career, I've been extremely lucky to work in places where I can be myself and not have to pretend (mostly), but there are still, despite all the research, managers and leaders who think they have to be a certain way once "manager" is added to their job title. It's so much more than a title or a position of authority, it's how you influence and inspire others to want to bring their best selves to work.

Being a good leader is simple but not easy. We have to let go of our pre-conceptions and show vulnerability, creating teams who want to work for us not ones who are led by fear of consequences. This is tricky for any human but there are some easy places to start:

A human leader has a clear and compelling vision of what they want to achieve and why. They communicate this vision to their team and help them see how their individual contributions fit into the big picture and make a difference. By giving people a sense of purpose and direction, they are more likely to do whatever is needed to make that vision happen.

A human leader listens to their teams ideas and concerns, they keep them informed of what is going on, what is expected of them and how they are doing. They encourage collaboration and foster a culture of trust and respect, creating a positive and supportive environment, where people feel valued and appreciated.

A human leader gives, and receives, feedback to help their teams, and themselves, grow. One approach does not fit all. Seeking feedback and acting on it boosts psychological safety, confidence and team performance.

A human leader recognises their team's strengths and achievements and celebrates their successes, while providing them with the necessary guidance and support to keep getting better and better.

A leader who tries to hide their "human-ness" can demotivate their team, create conflict, stifle creativity and lower morale and will probably spend all their time caught up in the recruitment process.

A human leader inspires their team to collaborate, learn from each other and enjoy what they do. So, take a deep breath and start to show up as a human, your team will appreciate it and work might just become a better place to be.

Engagement & retention go hand in hand

Thu, 23 Feb 2023 14:57:13 GMT

People may be staying in their roles right now because of the cost of living crisis. Moving jobs is a big risk.

But what happens when the world around us starts to settle? If you have spent time & energy making sure your teams know how important they are to your company, the likelihood is they will stay...if you haven't, they will probably leave and recruitment is expensive - in time, energy and money.

Have you ever sat through a presentation where the information you are getting is being presented on the slides and you wonder why the person presenting didn't just send you a handout to read? This is engagement and retention in it's simplest form...time spent where the presenter just wants to tell you their thoughts without any consideration for who you are or how you might be feeling.

At an organisational level, engagement is the level of enthusiasm and commitment your people have for their job and your business and can have a huge impact on your ability to retain your people.

And I'm not talking about having a pool table, or yoga, or head massages or free fruit! I'm talking about creating a positive work environment where mistakes can be made without fear of retribution and all voices can be heard, not just those who shout the loudest or are in "the club".

I'm talking about providing clear & transparent communication, recognition for good work and fostering trust and collaboration. And providing opportunities for development; for everyone.

These are the things that will keep your teams satisfied and committed which means they are less likely to look for opportunities elsewhere.

It will pay out in spades for you too:

When employees stay with a company, they become more knowledgeable, increasing efficiency, productivity, and improving quality of work.

Recruiting and training new employees is time-consuming and expensive. Increasing retention reduces the amount of time (and money), you spend in the recruitment & onboarding process.

Lots of people leaving can create uncertainty among those left behind. They may feel their efforts are not valued and they are not part of a stable and secure workplace. On the other hand, if it's the odd person leaving now and then (for whatever reason), your team will feel a sense of stability, security, and trust.

When your team are engaged, they are more likely to provide better customer service, leading to increased customer satisfaction and loyalty, which will have a positive impact on your reputation and ultimately, the bottom line.

A stable and committed workforce can help to build a strong company culture, where employees feel valued, respected, and supported. This creates collaboration, innovation, and a more positive work environment.

So, by focusing on employee engagement and creating a supportive and fulfilling work environment, your people will stay around for longer - even when the world isn't in chaos.

Start taking advantage of others expertise

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 17 Jan 2023 15:50:51 GMT

A conversation I had earlier in the week about a leader, (a very senior one), who micro-managed this particular person to the point of them leaving the company, really resonated with me as a human.

Because, I have, after nearly four years of running my own business, enlisted the expertise of a marketing company.

For two reasons:

They are the experts in branding and content creation and reaching the right audience
I need help!

Now, if I were the leader previously mentioned, I'd be ringing every day to find out what they were doing, how they were doing it and when they would have it all done by - I feel exhausted just writing the sentence! Why would I do that?

I am not a marketer or a graphic designer and while I can write and create content a bit, I couldn't really tell you if it hits the spot with my audience, I just like doing it! They are the experts, and I am paying them because I trust them to do the right things for me and my business.

Which is where the comparison comes in...if, as a leader, I feel I need to be constantly chasing, checking and correcting, then I have to do one of two things:

Give myself a long hard look in the mirror and wonder what I could be doing differently or better
Work out if I have the right people around me with the right skills and expertise

I would always advocate doing the former first because it develops our self-awareness, and means we are always learning, and adapting to our situation. It means we have to work out why we don't trust the people in our team enough to do their work. So, ask yourself some questions:

Have I given them the right skills?
Have I made the boundaries, and expectations clear?
Do I empower my team to do their work enough?
Am I asking the right questions at the right time?

If we don't know the answers to these questions, then we need to ask the team. If the answers are all yes, we have a conversation to confirm our expectations. If any of the answers are no, we have a conversation about how you can support them better.

Sometimes this means someone leaves your team, but you will know when you look at yourself in the mirror next time, you have done all you can.

So, if you are going to employ someone for their skills, knowledge, and experience, let them use it. Your life will be far less exhausting and your team will deliver whatever it is you need.

Why don't Managers manage?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 16 Nov 2022 16:15:01 GMT

There have been some interesting threads on LinkedIn the last few days. One asking, "What HR isn't" and the others asking you to rank what you would prefer with "Managers managing" being one of the options - it ranked quite highly! And a significant number of comments on the thread for "what HR isn't" was "looking after your people", "picking up the pieces", "responsible for your team's performance" and so on.

It made me wonder then, why managers don't manage...and after some research, reading, and reflecting, there are three very clear reasons:

They’re uncomfortable in their role
They lack confidence in their skills
They simply don’t know what to do

Let's take each reason in turn...

Looking after people is a skill in itself - it isn't technical or practical and although there are qualifications you can achieve; the knowledge won't necessarily help you when you are needing to have a conversation with one of your team who you suspect will not co-operate in the way theory suggests! We have to rely on our own emotions and intuition to guide us through so if I don't appreciate the scope of my role as a manager, it can come as a big, uncomfortable, shock when someone isn't performing well or they have so much going on outside of work, they need your help and support even though their job still needs doing
A manager who lacks the confidence in themselves and their decision making will be the ones most often knocking on the door of HR and may show signs of stress as they wrangle with the decisions they need to make. It will be a rare occasion for them suggest changes to their teams or their process for fear of rocking the boat or they may hide their lack of confidence behind bluster, bragging or blame other's inadequacies

For the first two reasons, it may be these managers have been over promoted - they are brilliant at the role they were doing and so given responsibility for the team. But amazing technical knowledge does not always stand you in good stead to look after people.

According to the most recent government statistics, less than half of managers in the UK (46%), have received any training in the last year (Employer Skills Survey 2019). No wonder so many don't know what to do!

The best way to build your managers’ capabilities is through training, but one training session will not provide all of the skills needed to be a great manager. There are so many changes going on in the world and in business, it isn’t possible to anticipate all of the new knowledge and skills managers may need, but it is important for every manager to be refreshing and updating their skills on a regular basis - just to keep on top of policy and legal changes, let alone new insight on how people behave, and therefore perform, at their best.

The classroom is a great place to learn the fundamentals, but it can't stop there. Assigning mentors, engaging coaches, running action learning groups, attending conferences, running refresher sessions, are all ways to support managers to manage - we have to do better than only 46% getting the development they need.

The Gift of Quiet

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 26 Oct 2022 15:18:54 GMT

How often do you allow yourself some quiet time? And I mean quiet - no noise whatsoever...just you on your own in peace?

If you're anything like me the answer will be "not very often" or not at all, but it's taking its toll.

I've been mentally tired for a few months now and I couldn't work out why...I exercise every other day, I sleep reasonably well, I've massively cut down on my wine consumption and I eat well.

Thinking about this last week, it dawned on me, my environment is never "quiet"...I'm having conversations with my daughter, my friends, my peers, my clients or the TV or radio is on or I'm listening to music or a podcast while I work out or the cat is meowing for his tea 4 hours before it's due!

I am never in the quiet which means when I do go to bed and everything is switched off, my brain can finally sort out its thoughts in peace! This often means I don't fall asleep straight away.

On Saturday morning, I woke with a million thoughts whirring in my head but instead of getting up and switching on all the noise, I chose to lie in bed with the quiet. I used the Box Breathing technique* (created by Mark Divine to manage stress), to encourage myself to focus only on counting my breathing.

My mind and body were peaceful for maybe ten minutes, but the difference was amazing. I felt well rested, refreshed and ready to tackle my other thoughts with clarity.

I will never give up all the noise, I love it too much, but being present with only my breathing for even a short amount of time is a gift to myself and it's helping me to tackle my tiredness and feelings of being overwhelmed.

Maybe it's something you could try when the world just seems a bit too much?

*Box breathing is a simple technique that you can do anywhere, including at a work desk or in a cafe. It is called box breathing to encourage people to think about a box as they do it.

To try box breathing:

sit with your back supported in a comfortable chair and your feet on the floor
close your eyes and then breathe in through your nose while counting to four slowly, feeling the air enter into your lungs
hold your breath while counting slowly to four, trying not to clamp your mouth or nose shut
slowly exhale while counting slowly to four
hold the exhale for the count of four
repeat steps 2 to 5 at least three times

It's okay to not be okay

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 27 Sep 2022 09:56:43 GMT

"It's okay to not be okay" is a phrase that is being used more and more, mainly linked to mental health. But what if we translated it across the whole of our lives?

I was watching a TED Talk with Brené Brown earlier this month about the power of vulnerability, whether it brings us shame and fear or joy, creativity and belonging. It struck me how much energy many of us put into hiding our vulnerabilities:

We find ways to numb our feelings with exercise or food or alcohol or drugs.
We make everything that is uncertain, certain, by limiting discussions to "I'm right and you are wrong!"
We strive for perfect - perfect relationships, perfect bodies and perfect jobs.
And we pretend that what we do has no impact on those around us

The research Brené has done shows how those who believe wholeheartedly in their "imperfections" making them who they are, are the people who experience the most joy, creativity and belonging in their lives.

These people, as well as showing their vulnerabilities with no shame or fear of consequence, have the courage to tell the story of who they are, have compassion for themselves first and then others and are willing to let go of who they think they should be, in order to be who they are.

Imagine a workplace where your leaders express all their emotions. It's impossible to numb only some of our emotion - if we want to numb the negative emotions, we must numb the positive ones as well and that makes us miserable overall. If we expressed them all, what joy and creativity might we create?

Imagine a workplace where we all knew perfect wasn't an option and making mistakes was okay? Or one where we recognised that our language, our behaviours, and our actions do have an impact on everyone around us?

Imagine a workplace where we believe we are enough and worthy and are kinder and gentler to ourselves and those around us?

Brené believes sharing our vulnerabilities is the foundation of great leadership - being willing to relinquish our need to control and direct everything and invest in doing things where there are no guarantees.

So, it is okay not to be okay, and to share it. We can't make the uncertain, certain but, there's comfort in being altogether in our imperfect, uncertainty.

How important is development?

Tue, 26 Jul 2022 12:32:25 GMT

The "Great Resignation" is an American term being used to describe the number of people looking for new jobs within the next 12 months, but it's not just a US phenomenon.

According to the Work Trend Index published by Microsoft, 41% of workers are likely to leave their roles. That's nearly half of the workforce!

What's driving it includes a number of reasons from lack of flexibility to feeling undervalued and sitting at number four on the list is "lack of job growth or career development".

Knowing there are opportunities for you to learn and develop within your role or to advance your career is becoming ever more important in the workplace, and this is where personal development plans come into play.

Of course, there may be some upskilling needed for everyone in the department or business. For example: if there's a new IT system being launched or you are entering a new market with different customer needs, but in most instances, the conversation about development will be, and should be, individual.

Development doesn't need to be an onerous, form filling activity, it can just be a conversation where you ask some really great questions, giving the individual accountability and offering your support as their leader.

Having the discussion will help you to understand whether they are really happy to stay in their current role or if they have aspirations to move into new or different roles.

Regardless, there will be development needed. If they are happy in their current role, how are they going to keep their skills and knowledge up to date? If they have aspirations to move up or across, what projects or opportunities can you offer to enable this? And what can they do?

The result of these conversations can then be recorded in a really simple plan:

What do I want to develop?

How am I going to do this?

When am I going to do this?

How will I know the development has made a difference?

What support will I need?

The "how" doesn't have to cost anything other than a bit of time and attention - maybe a coach or mentor, or some role shadowing, or attending webinars or networking events.

The opportunities to develop and learn are endless, we just need to learn with the intention of doing something differently or better.

Everybody needs somebody to learn from

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Mon, 27 Jun 2022 14:55:30 GMT

Last week, BeanStalk Learning celebrated it's third year as a business...congratulations I hear you say! And thank you, it has been one of the most rewarding, yet difficult, periods of my working life so far.

When I started the business, I had no idea just how much I would learn on a daily basis, from everyone around me - friends, peers, ex-colleagues, fellow business owners and then add the global pandemic into the mix?! It's been hell of a ride so far!

As you might expect, I'm a big fan of learning so I got stuck in; working out how to get the best from LinkedIn, creating a website, learning how to deliver team sessions in the virtual world etc...but I realised a few months back, my own motivation to learn wasn't enough - I had reached the limits of my own knowledge & skill and didn't know where to go next.

My preference is to speak to think and one of the things I began to miss was that person who I could bounce ideas off - who would tell me it was a brilliant idea or indeed a rubbish one.

Usually my boss in my previous world, they would listen to me thinking, ask some great questions and offer me their thoughts & experience based on what had worked well for them in the past.

So, without a boss, I decided I needed a mentor who would be able to provide me with that support. There have been a couple of false starts where we just haven't clicked with each other but I am pleased to say I now have an amazing mentor, who is supportive and challenging with oodles of experience.

Mentors are amazing - find one! I promise they will only add value to you and your life. We can sometimes become complacent with our own knowledge and skill but having someone to push back, challenge or cheer you on is priceless. We would all benefit from having somebody to learn from.

When your team don't want to let go of you

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 24 May 2022 11:01:12 GMT

What education teaches us, (specifically schools), is that we always need to know the answer when asked a question, those in positions of authority don't have to follow the same rules as the students, good memory recall gets you good grades, we must conform, not think for ourselves and ask permission to do anything.

Okay, maybe this is an over-generalisation but most schools and education do not provide us with the skills we need to take us into the workplace. How education is set-up hasn't changed much since the 19th Century when the first Education Act was passed in 1870. Back then, the workplace was completely different and everything I mentioned above was reflected in how work happened. But this is not the case today - we work in a very different world.

Back in the mid 1990's when I was cutting my teeth as a people manager, I promoted a very capable, bright, and determined young woman to be my deputy manager. Despite her obvious capability, she would not make a decision without getting my approval first. This meant she rang me a lot whenever I took time off.

Coaching wasn't as prevalent back then as it is today but I did my best to encourage her to make, and standby, her decisions when I wasn't around (and when I was). She was terrified of making a mistake or making the wrong decision and the consequences that might bring.

It all came to a head when after the 6th phone call of the day when I was taking some time off, I very bluntly told her to not call me again and we would talk about anything that happened the next day...not my best manager moment!

Unsurprisingly, however, there were no disasters to discuss.

We had a conversation about her need to check everything out despite her being in the best position to make the call. She wasn't long out of education and her fear of getting things wrong was a hangover from her days at school. So, we made a plan, her confidence grew and she left me eventually to become a manager in her own right. Very proud manager moment!

What I learnt was that while we might be willing to handover control and empower our teams, they may not be ready themselves to let go of your approval. We have to follow some rules to break those habits from the past:

Have a conversation
Standby decisions made in public and discuss in private
Have a conversation
Create an environment where mistakes can be made and learned from
Have a conversation

The best leadership tool you have is you

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Thu, 28 Apr 2022 09:44:35 GMT

There are many ways to communicate your message as a leader - conferences, team meetings, focus groups, 121s etc, but what about the messages you send with your actions or your behaviour?

We can often send mixed messages to our teams. For example:

Telling your team their wellbeing is important and you don't want them working outside of hours but then sending emails late at night. Even if you have said you don't expect a response, their brain will start whirring and they will be thinking about whatever it is you sent.

Setting everything up before you go away on holiday, making the team feel trusted and then checking in every few days "just to make sure everything is alright".

Advocating diversity and then creating a job advert with no flexibility and very specific experience or qualifications.

All of the above send mixed messages - your actions and behaviours aren't matching your words. And I'm sure you can add other examples you have experienced.

Often the "what if's?" start to cloud our thinking - imagine you are away on holiday:

What if my team don't really need me anymore? Well, brilliant - if you have done the best job at giving them the skills and knowledge to work without you, that is amazing.

What if it's better in the team without me around? It's unlikely if you have a good relationship with your people and you are the provider of the team vision, the support and the challenge but if it is a worry, ask them. What was it like while I was away? The pace of work, the atmosphere, the workload? What should we keep? What needs to be different?

What if something has happened but they don't want to bother me while I'm away? Well, good! They are being respectful of your recharge time and they will find a way or someone else to ask. Just remember to return the favour when they are away from work.

We all know it's hard looking after people. Our own beliefs, wants, needs and experiences can get in the way of what is best for our team. Or the culture of the business you are working in have boundaries and expectations that constrict your own actions.

But the best tool in your leadership toolbox is you. Creating psychological safety for your team will lead to higher performance and engagement - the rest i.e. the results, will follow.

Time to top-up our resilience?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 22 Mar 2022 15:23:07 GMT

Almost two years to the day, the UK entered it's first ever lockdown (well, in my lifetime anyway). Schools closed in a moment's notice, frontline staff were more in demand than ever and offices emptied overnight. We lived in chaos for a few months while we worked out how to function in this new world.

Over the following months our resilience was tested as parents undertook home schooling, lines became blurred between work and home for some and we got used to not seeing anyone in person, except the delivery person and they had to stand two metres from the front door! Zoom parties and online quizzes became our new way of connection to temporarily break our boxset binging!

If you had told me I'd be delivering development almost 100% of the time back then I would have laughed and said "not possible!" but now that conversation would be completely different.

It is possible! Whoever is running the session has to work a little bit harder and there needs to be more breaks to allow time away from the screen, but learning and engagement still happens.

I have been learning every day since March 2020. What works? What's new and how can I use it? What doesn't work? And honestly, it has worn me out. My resilience is at a lifetime low. My patience is wearing thin, I need sleep more than ever and I take more breaks than I ever have in my working day to try to stop my brain going fuzzy.

I am trying to restore it bit by bit though. I handwrite notes, scripts, blogs etc so that I am not looking at my screen all the time, I take advantage of the sunshine and walk with no music or podcasts to rest my brain and I try to see people in person as much as I can.

How are you feeling? Are you taking the opportunity to refill your resilience bottle? Are you giving those around you the opportunity? We have to refill, otherwise burnout is inevitable.

Do you always live by your values and beliefs?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Mon, 21 Feb 2022 11:47:28 GMT

I watched the interview with Novak Djokovic last week where he shared his reasons for not being vaccinated. As an elite athlete at the top of his game, he is extremely mindful of what he puts in his body and doesn't feel there is enough evidence to compel him to have it, yet.

He also strongly believes in personal choice...even if this means he wasn't able to play in the Australian Open and may well miss out on Wimbledon and the US Open too. Being who he is, of course makes it easier for him to stick to his guns.

But how many times have you reluctantly agreed to an action, a plan or a process, despite it going against your own values or beliefs?

I know I have - certainly in my early career years. For example, I suspected one of my line managers was stealing from the business. Tills didn't add up and the banking was always a little bit short but I didn't tell anyone because I didn't want it to affect my career even though I knew it was wrong. There were many times when behaviour wasn't appropriate, certainly by today's standards, but I would laugh it off or stand by, because I wanted to be part of the crowd.

I cringe when I think about it now, but unlike Novak, I wasn't ready to accept the consequences of standing up for what I believed. As time has gone on and I've matured, I don't stay quiet anymore even when the consequences mean I may be labelled as "difficult" or "challenging". But part of my brand is about being open, honest and straightforward. I have to practice what I preach otherwise I would come across as disingenuous.

I wonder how Novak's team have reacted to this or how many of his sponsors will be happy with his decision? I suspect he doesn't care and I admire him for upholding his beliefs. Maybe the change in leadership we need relies on more people doing the same.

The Power of Kindness

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 12 Jan 2022 13:36:37 GMT

Last week, I picked up my daughter from the train station. It was her first day back at college and I was out anyway at the time her train arrived.

As she got into the car, a woman knocked on my window. My first thought? What's wrong with the car? I rolled down the window and she asked if I was my daughter's Mum. Second thought? What has she done?

I nodded and the woman began to tell us what a pleasure it had been to sit in the same carriage as my daughter and her friends on her way home. She said it was lovely to hear them chatting away with each other, wearing their masks and being polite to anyone else they spoke to. Cue warm, fuzzy feeling moment!

What was even better, was the woman was talking to my daughter, not me. So, I sat, beaming and trying really hard not to get emotional! The woman finished with a thank you to my daughter and a thank you to me for raising such a wonderful young woman, before going on her way.

We both smiled all the way home. How kind for this woman to take time out to come and talk to us. So often in the workplace, we have the conversation with a person's line manager to pass on - for doing something brilliantly (or not), rather than telling the person ourselves.

But, herein lies the problem - if the woman had come to me to tell me about my daughter, whilst I would have felt the same, I would not be able to convey the same emotion to my daughter, because it would have been second hand and I hadn't experienced the woman's pleasure.

It is so much kinder to have these conversations in person - whether it be thanks, praise or about some situation that has upset you. No-one can convey your feelings because they are your feelings.

Let's stop using other's line managers to have conversations on our behalf. They will be so much more powerful if we have them ourselves.

And much kinder.

Your way may not be the only way

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 24 Nov 2021 15:10:04 GMT

I often need a moment to clear my thoughts after a coaching session - even more so when it's in the virtual world. So, as I sat down with my cup of tea to do just that last week, I caught the end of Animal Park.

The keepers were pitting the otters against the meerkats in a competition to see who could solve a puzzle more quickly.

The meerkats went first - they all came running over and worked together to solve the puzzle and get the reward of food. They achieved this in 56 seconds. The otters, on the other hand, investigated the puzzle together before solving it which they did in 22 seconds.

Surely the otters completed the puzzle in the best way? Standing back, thinking about it and then solving it? Well, they were certainly quicker but total time was about the same for both I'd say.

Where am I going with this? Often as leaders of people, we believe two things:

Firstly, we have to know the answer and secondly, we have to know the best way. In some cases this is true, but if others follow a different path but achieve the same outcome, why is our way best?

Let me put this into context. If I am learning to drive, there is only one way. The rules of the road and the workings of a car dictate this. So, yes, my driving instructor is absolutely right when they tell me to be in first gear when moving away...there is no other way.

But, if there is heavy traffic on the motorway I want to drive on, I have a choice. I can use the motorway and accept I will be moving along very slowly, or I can find an alternative route - which may be more miles but means I am on the move. Both choices will probably take about the same amount of time, and I will reach my destination. Neither choice is right or wrong.

And this is the same when we look after people. We don't need to know the answer to everything - humans aren't black and white so what works for us, may not work for someone else. There are many models out there we can have in our toolkit to help us, but we need to find the right one to use in that moment. If our preference is to stand back and look before acting, then so be it. But if we want to just dive in and work it out as we go, that is fine too.

Having manager or leader in our title does not make us super human with special powers. Knowing how to signpost or support others to the answer is more effective than trying to know the answer to everything and it will make us curious enough to keep learning.

Letting go - a necessary, but hard, skill to learn

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Mon, 25 Oct 2021 12:21:43 GMT

My daughter is learning to drive. We agreed she had to have at least ten lessons with her instructor before we went out together so she could get comfortable with the mechanics of driving and the rules of the road.

I know how to drive, I've been doing it for nearly thirty years so to sit in the passenger seat with my daughter in control of the car was a big deal and probably one of the biggest challenges around managing myself I've had for a long time.

I knew I had to mainly keep quiet, encouraging her every now and then when her confidence dropped which sounds easy right?

Not for me!! I had to work out how to "let go" of control while fighting myself to keep hold of it!

So, before we go out in the car together, we make a promise to each other - every time at the moment. I will only ask her to do something if it really needs to be done - like braking when the car in front doesn't indicate and we are getting really close to its' back end for example. And she promises to stay calm and not discuss or debate when this happens. That's it, our only rule - clearly agreed.

While we are out, I might ask a few questions: usually "what's the speed limit along here?" or "what gear are you in?" but other than that I am mostly silent.

Sometimes I forget to breathe and internally I am wrestling myself to not be constantly telling her what she needs to do next, because if I did, it will take much longer for her to learn and build her confidence. As long as we are both safe, I have to stay quiet.

To see her progress over the past few months has been amazing and it's really reminded me of the challenges we face as leaders when we have people to look after.

Letting go of our control over tasks that need to be done is, I think, completely necessary yet one of the hardest skills to learn.

Being able to hand over control has so many benefits - it gives you more time to concentrate on your priorities in your role, it empowers your team to make their own decisions and ultimately develops your team's capability.

Despite all this, it's a struggle for many of us because of fear and/or experience. Fear because our team might not need us anymore; fear others might start to know more than you do; fear they won't do the task "your way". I'm sure you could add more.

To have the biggest impact you can as a leader, the internal battle has to happen and the fear, (whatever it is), overcome. Because if we keep hold of everything, no-one will ever learn anything new or how to stand on their own two feet and you won't be able to grow yourself or the team.

I know the battle within myself will get less and less the more confident a driver my daughter becomes and the reward will be her passing her test and being able to pick me up from parties for a change!

How close relationships can go wrong

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 14:07:59 GMT

Sometimes it is difficult to know what is going on with someone else, particularly when they are well practiced at hiding their feelings and we are in the midst of a pandemic!

At the beginning of August, I had a fallout with a very close friend of mine. Something had happened over six months ago which had really upset them but I had absolutely no idea because my friend had bottled up that emotion rather than telling me at the time.

Once it had all come out, I thought about what our relationship had been like over the last six months - there had been a little tension but at the time, I had put it down to the pandemic, a third lockdown and my own distractions with work and home - I was completely oblivious to the fact my friend felt our friendship was being threatened!

I have been in this place, where I have been upset by something someone has said or done, but I've not said anything and stewed over it for months and eventually just let it go. In my early career, I did this a lot.

I have learnt over the years though. People generally act with good intention and don't purposefully go out of their way to annoy each other. As humans, we like harmony - much of what we do is to maintain this harmony, not disrupt it.

So, sometimes, I can just let it go but when I can't, I will have the conversation. If I can't do it in the moment, I'll do it as close to as I can. If we don't know what we have said or done is hurtful or upsetting, then we are completely powerless to change and we may well keep doing it.

I'm hoping, if this had been a year without a pandemic, I would have noticed the tensions sooner and asked what was wrong and my friend wouldn't have been seeing my devil horns every time we spoke! But while I take responsibility for not noticing, they have to take responsibility for not telling me sooner. We cannot control how others behave but we can control ourselves.

Thankfully, our friendship remains strong but it could have been so very different.

The Importance of Self Care

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Thu, 01 Jul 2021 13:58:51 GMT

When you are really busy, what sacrifices do you make? This a really personal piece this month about my own self care and how I have sacrificed it for the sake of work and deadlines.

My health, my family and my friends have all suffered from my lack of attention over the last few months and I knew something needed to different.

I am B12 deficient, which means I need to have a booster jab every 12 weeks. If I miss my jab, I can't think straight, my patience completely disappears and I am exhausted; no matter how much sleep I have. I was four weeks late for this dose because I couldn't/wouldn't find time in my diary to book the appointment.

So I felt unwell and really grumpy. This led to my daughter getting the brunt when she asked me for some help with her college work. In the end, I'm ashamed to say, we booked some time in my diary so I could concentrate on what she needed.

And last week, my girlfriends and I had booked to go "out, out" for the first time together in 18 months. But I cancelled because I had a deadline to meet and I couldn't see light at the end of the tunnel so I worked instead; making myself more tired and grumpy!

I am fortunate enough to be in charge of my own workload so I really have no excuse for overloading myself but I know this is not the case for everyone.

So, how do we, as leaders, look after ourselves which then allows us to look after our teams?

Firstly, recognise your own changes in behaviour, demeanour, mood and/or output...I've had my B12 jab now and on reflection, the last few months have been pretty miserable. It wasn't until my scheduled meeting with my daughter I realised just how miserable I was feeling. I immediately moved things around and booked my appointment because I knew it would give me the energy to get out of my own created chaos of work and re-balance my life.

Secondly, we all know the virtual world adds in extra exhaustion...ending one meeting and immediately jumping onto the next...one after the other all day long. But you are in control of your diaries - ask "why am I being invited?" and if the reason isn't good enough, decline. If it is good enough, maybe suggest it's 45 minutes rather than an hour, to give you time (and others) to gather your thoughts.

And finally, you will have your own anxieties about what the next few months might bring, and so will your team. If you share yours, they are more likely to share theirs and then you can work through it all together, which is a much better way - looking after each other.

Self care is so important - without it, life becomes stressful, exhausting and dull. So, this afternoon, I'm switching off to watch Roger Federer play at Wimbledon.

Being vulnerable is okay

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 18 May 2021 11:31:08 GMT

I was talking to a peer of mine a few weeks back about a particularly difficult relationship she had with someone in her team. When I asked her if she had told this person how their actions was making her feel, an emphatic No! was the answer, followed by "I'm her manager, I can't do that; that's not what managers do!"

This response really surprised me; the woman I was having the conversation with, cares deeply about her team and creating a good working environment. Agreed, in many workplaces there are managers who believe they have to have the answer to everything, telling everyone what to do and keeping all their feelings and emotions to themselves; but some of the best leaders I know are prepared to show their vulnerabilities.

An ex-CEO of mine, once postponed a meeting telling us all, he wasn't in the right mindset to deal with the discussion that needed to happen. So, we rescheduled. Half the room, nodded and left, the other half were visibly shocked and didn't know quite what to do next!

This is an example of being vulnerable which takes courage. Brené Brown suggests vulnerability is about courage and feeling discomfort; not necessarily sharing our deepest fears and emotions.

Another CEO I worked with, would use the phrase "do what is right, not what is comfortable". Often, if a decision we were making felt uncomfortable, we knew we were making the right one.

Being vulnerable is telling someone you can't make a decision right now, giving an opportunity to someone else because they will be better at it than you or telling someone how their behaviour is affecting you. It is not a weakness, it shows real strength.

All easy to write, I know, because we have to come to terms with our own discomfort first and the legacy of the more traditional rules around how to be a manager.

It is okay to ask for help and say you don't know the answer - showing up as ourselves rather than the version we think we should be is much less exhausting and will ultimately build trust.

The Power of Trust

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 28 Apr 2021 11:54:52 GMT

I am a super fan of Patrick Lencioni; he is a powerhouse in regards to organisational health and probably best known for his book "The Five Dysfunctions of a Team" The first "dysfunction" he describes is lack of trust and it underpins the other four: fear of conflict, lack of commitment, avoidance of accountability and inattention to results.

If you can't build trust, the others are unlikely to change.

To be fair, anyone who works within leadership development will have building trust pretty high up on their list for developing leadership skills.

There is no one size fits all for building trust, however, because, according to Erik Eriksson, we decide fairly early on in our lives, based on our experiences, whether we can trust people or not. And we mainly fall into two camps:

Trust people until they prove otherwise
Mistrust until people prove they can be trusted

As leaders we are used to having to adapt our style and behaviour to each individual, peer and team but there are some elements you can focus on to build trust within any of these relationships:

Reliability
Credibility
Intimacy

Reliability is about doing what you said you were going to do, when you said you were going to do it. If you promise a team member to investigate what projects are running that could support their development if they get involved, by their next 121, then you have to deliver on that promise. Once you might be forgiven and sometimes even twice, but not keeping your promises more than three times and the trust people have for you will start to disappear.

Being credible is the ability to convince others you know what you are talking about; you might be a specialist in a particular subject or have experience of a previous situation. And sometimes, you may have to say "I don't know, but I'll find out" - building credibility and reliability all in one little sentence!

Building your relationship with someone to the level you are BOTH comfortable with is the third element of intimacy. For some, this might mean you knowing they have a daughter and they own a cat; for others you'll know full family history, all birthdays and anniversaries and hear all about the argument they may have had this morning.

Three fairly simple ways to develop trust with those around you. Put them altogether and they are powerful behaviours to have.

But, there's a caveat. You need to mean it and have the intention of building trust. If you don't, the other person will know; in their gut or in their heart, something isn't right and all your effort will be wasted.

How do we get our teams to work differently?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Mon, 12 Apr 2021 15:16:17 GMT

I've written about out cat, Chester, before. He is a rescue cat with only three legs. He's lived with us for two years now and because of circumstances, I've been at home pretty much every day to let him in and out, as he pleases, through the back door. But this is changing and we need him to be able to use the cat flap so he can look after himself.

It's a big change for him and, if you believe cats have facial expressions, he is definitely glaring at us and asking "why would I do that? Just open the door for me, like you have always done"!

This is often the reaction we see from our people when change needs to happen and that reluctance might be for a number of reasons. There will be many others, but these are the ones I hear the most:

I'm nervous about working the new way
I don't understand why things need to change
I like the status quo
It won't really change

How as a leader, do we deal with these?

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross' emotional curve for the stages of grief has long been adapted into the business world because although the loss of the status quo is nowhere near as traumatic as grief, it does cause anxiety for many.

When people are in the stages of denial or resistance, and sometimes the initial stages of exploration, we need patience - we may have to explain what is happening and why a number of times to the same person and we need understanding of what the person's concerns are. What may seem trivial to you is likely to be a big concern for them and we need to understand that so we can help that person move through their anxiety.

We need to encourage our team and be consistent in the new approach. Maybe, you are introducing a new process...work through it together a couple of times giving people the confidence to keep going and remain sure the old way of working is no longer an option.

In Chester's case he can't tell us exactly what his glare means but we've made some good guesses. The cat flap may smell of the cat we had before he arrived. She happily went in and out on her own. So we have cleaned it again to be sure there are no lingering smells.

It is also a bit tricky for him to get through because he only has one back leg so we are encouraging him with praise when he does it and there's the odd treat for him sometimes too.

I need to be better at consistency though. He is a stubborn cat and quite grumpy so I think if we make that the only option he'll refuse to go out altogether and then he'll miss the sunbathing he loves so much. And finally, and most importantly, patience is the key. We've been teaching him for a week now and he will come in on his own; he just needs to master going out. And I need to slowly stop giving him the option of using the back door!

How do we enable the hybrid workplace?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 02 Mar 2021 14:41:24 GMT

If you're anything like me you will be waiting with baited breath to find out how your organisation is going to embrace (or not) the working at home phenomenon we have been experiencing over the last 12 months. And if you read, listen or watch the news the corporate world is split between permanent home-working (we're selling 40% of our office space - HSBC) through to everybody needs to be back in the office full time (Goldman Sachs).

I appreciate both these examples are in the banking sector but a lot of employees (whose roles allow them) aren't sure either. Working "at" home is not the same as working "from" home.

The pandemic has meant we are working AT home alongside our partners, families, pets, home-schooling - squashed into free corners of our homes, using the dining or kitchen table or ironing boards as desks or cookbooks to raise up our laptops or our Wi-Fi is unreliable because there are 300 people at home using it instead of the usual 30 in the day - our choice to "go into work" has been taken away. We simply go into another room or swap chairs!

There is divided opinion too about productivity during lockdown. Some have heralded themselves as being more productive than ever, some are catching up at midnight because our partners, families, pets and home-schooling are getting in the way during the day. We're also exhausted living at our virtual workplace. It's hard being on screen all day every day. Patience is fraying and according to some recent research, workplace tensions are escalating because we aren't interacting in person.

These are not usual circumstances - obvious I know but some of the posts I see on Social Media appear to have forgotten this.

So, what's the solution? There is lots of talk about the "hybrid workplace" bringing greater meaning to the term flexible working. But how do we manage a team when three are working at home and three are in the office and a decision needs to be made or an update given? Or 4 of the team have compressed their hours and no longer work on a Friday and that's the day the decision needs making?

There are some organisations who are setting precedent - if there is mix of home and office working, everyone still meets virtually but at their own workstation. I don't know about you, but I have in the past attended a meeting virtually when everyone else is in the same room. It is not a pleasant experience because the rest of the team often forget you are there. It is important therefore to keep virtual meetings inclusive and the suggestion above does just that.

If it's different working hours, then you need to agree the boundaries with your team. If a decision is urgent, can I contact you during non-work hours? And if I can, what's the best way to do that? Text, WhatsApp, phone call? Our boundaries will have to be reset and become more flexible based on our teams needs.

But, most of all, how are you going to manage your teams mental health as we continue in the virtual world? How are you going to manage the transition as we emerge in public once again? My advice? Be human - ask questions, listen to the answers and support your team as they wish to be supported.

Are you spending time leading yourself?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 02 Feb 2021 17:39:52 GMT

This is a tricky question to answer...it might be yes, no or not enough. But how do we know?

Leading yourself is intrinsically linked to emotional intelligence or EQ. Daniel Goleman suggests there are four elements which make up someone's emotional intelligence:

Self-Awareness
Self-Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management

Self-awareness and self-management are both about leading yourself. The better you know your strengths, your shortcomings, your emotional triggers; the better you are able to manage yourself.

This does, however, all take time, reflection and practice. This means you have to find time in your day or week to think about you...how have you shown up as a leader? What happened? What does that mean? What have I learnt? What's my plan for next week? How do I put my plan into practice?

A lot of questions I know and some of us will naturally reflect on an interaction, particularly if it didn't go the way we expected. But, we often miss the "so what now?" question.

It's understandable - often we don't want to admit to ourselves we might have been wrong or tell anyone else. This is okay. This is deep-set in our behaviours all the way back to when we were at school.

Not wanting to get a question wrong or make a suggestion for fear of retribution from the teacher or ridicule from our classmates.

I haven't been in school for a very long time...but I will always remember the teacher who sat me under a shelf so I hurt myself every time I stood up or put my hand up. It took me a long time to understand the impact this had had on me and my reluctance to ask questions in a meeting.

So, it's tough, looking at ourselves in the mirror but there are lots of ways to help us do this.

Personality profiling - not to put us into boxes but to support our understanding of ourselves and our impact on others and to start a good conversation
Finding a trusted colleague for some honest insight - both good and bad
Enlisting the support of a good mentor or coach
Asking for feedback from your team, your peers and your own manager. Be prepared for some feedback you might not want to hear!

Feedback is often referred to as a gift, meaning you can choose to accept it, reflect and/or do something different...or not! But, you have to open a gift first to be able to make that decision.

Taking a quiet ten minutes a day for some self reflection is crucial to your success as a leader. If you are leading yourself well and role modelling the behaviours you expect to see in others, looking after and leading your team will be easier. No less complex, but easier.

The Power of Intentional Learning

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Mon, 04 Jan 2021 13:35:27 GMT

2020 taught us a lot about the way we live and work and for many, the changes made will remain because they have made us realise the benefits; like not having to commute every day if you work in an office, it's okay to wait a few days for a delivery - did we really need it the same day? And asking for help when we need it most.

But some of the process changes would never have happened, or taken many years, if it wasn't for the pandemic.

My sister is a GP and within a couple of weeks of Lockdown 1.0, the majority of appointments were virtual, they ran on time and prescriptions could be organised and picked up without even visiting the surgery. Suddenly, the customer experience improved for many. This would not have happened pre-pandemic because we all thought we needed to see our doctor's face to face all the time - it's just how things were.

Thinking there is no other way and not exploring other options is often labelled as having a Fixed Mindset; where we find all the reasons we can for not changing. The opposite is having a Growth Mindset where intentional learning and curiosity are at play.

If someone has a fixed mindset you might hear them saying "I will never be any good at presenting". If someone has a growth mindset, you might hear "How can I get more experience to improve my presenting skills?". This is intentional learning carried out by the individual who will be curious to find the best way that works for them. It might involve gaining some foundation skills in a workshop, watching how others present and picking out the bits that resonate or putting their hand up first every time there is an opportunity to present.

We have been forced to learn in 2020 - how does Zoom or Teams work? What's the best way to help people feel safe at work? How can we make sure our customers get a great experience even though half of my team are isolating?

Some of us will have been brilliant at it and some of us might need an extra bit of help to develop intentional learning and curiosity and keep it going.

There are five steps to nurturing a growth mindset:

Set small, clear outcomes - I would suggest ditching the 3 or 5 year plan for now. Who knows what will happen next week let alone next month. What needs to happen by the end if this month? What would you like to be better at?
Remove distractions - difficult when the whole family is working/staying at home but if you can find a quiet space even for ten minutes, it'll help hugely with the next step
Practice regular reflection - whether it is reflecting on the outcome of a huge project or thinking about whether a conversation could have gone better, reflection is the best route to intentional learning along with step 4
Actively seek actionable feedback - ask people what they saw, heard and felt and follow up with what could I have done differently
And finally, practice, practice, practice - it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become really great at something, so practice deliberately to be better

Last year was tough in so many ways for all of us and the break over Christmas and New Year was much needed...if you are thinking "I can't cope with the uncertainty anymore", maybe reframe to "what do I need in order to make it through the day/week/month?"

Be curious and learn with intention.

How to deal with our perceptions

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Thu, 26 Nov 2020 16:14:52 GMT

I've always been fascinated by how we respond to people sharing their perception of something we have done or not done and the impact that has on us then doing the same.

Many of us will create our own stories about other people, situations and events based on our own experiences in the past. Sometimes, this leads us to avoiding having conversations we really need to have and impacts the relationships we have with people.

Because "last time another person reacted badly" or "I've seen that look before and it didn't end well" means we confirm our own thoughts to ourselves.

Why do we do it and can we do anything about it?

The Ladder of Inference, first published by Chris Argyris, suggests there are six steps to us drawing our conclusions and two steps about how we can change it.

Step 1: Actual, observable, facts, data, or experiences to consider are made available - we record everything going on as if we had a video camera.

For example: there is someone in your team meeting who keeps shuffling about and checking their watch

Step 2: A process of “selecting” data from step 1 occurs - because there is a lot of data in our video, we select and deselect the information we want.

Example (cont'd): now I've noticed it, all I can see is them shuffling about and checking their watch. I have discounted all other available data.

Step 3: Assumptions about the data you’ve selected are made.

Example (cont'd): They look really uncomfortable

Step 4: Conclusions are drawn based on the data you’ve selected, what you’ve determined that the data means, and the assumptions you’ve made.

Example (cont'd): I think they are uncomfortable because there is something they don't want to say or to share

Step 5: You adopt beliefs that are associated with your conclusions.

Example (cont'd): That person is clearly not forthcoming with their feelings or thoughts

Step 6: You take actions based on the beliefs you’ve adopted.

Example (cont'd): I'm going to ask them to share with me what they are thinking and why they aren't sharing.

There are now two dangerous loops we can get ourselves in. The first is our beliefs will now inform how we select our data from our video i.e. we select data to support our beliefs. If we think this person is untrustworthy, we will find evidence/data to support that. And the second is our actions. If we are going to ask more questions of this person, that may make them more uncomfortable giving us more observable data of this discomfort in our meeting...a little like Catch 22!

But, we can stop this all from happening...in two ways.

(1) Question you assumptions and conclusions...either on your own or with a trusted colleague. In the example above, ask "what else could be going on?" This leads to the second point

(2) Seek contrary data - could this person have another meeting to get to? Do they need to leave the office for an appointment? Have they got other work to finish before the end of the day?

The possibilities are endless and we will never know unless we ask...

"I noticed you were shuffling about and looking at your watch a lot in yesterday's meeting, I assumed you had something to say but weren't willing to share it, I felt mistrusted and I would like to discuss this further."

Now we can find out the real reason...it still might be the person was uncomfortable sharing their thoughts...in front of everyone else; but it's in the open and you can work out how to change it.

What's the one thing you will keep?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 04 Nov 2020 12:43:56 GMT

What's the one thing that has changed during the pandemic you will continue to do when life is a little more settled? This is the question Lucy Adams from Disruptive HR has been asking her podcast guests over the last six months.

My answer would be keeping in more regular, less formal contact with everyone...colleagues, peers, friends and family. Whether that be a phone call, a virtual call or sitting in the autumn sun drinking a takeaway coffee...it has been happening more regularly for me and I intend to keep it this way. Not allowing other stuff to get in the way of connection and communication.

Good communication has always been an important part of running a successful business, particularly when it is timely and given in a variety of ways to suit the message and the audience. But there are changes happening at the moment which make it so much more important.

Organisations are facing uncertainty, constantly; whether they have thrived or are struggling and this means employees will be feeling anxious, overwhelmed and in need of additional support...quarterly briefings and/or town halls, monthly team meetings or 121s aren't enough right now.

I know many businesses who are talking to their teams regularly...some every day and some every week. But I have also heard stories of people who haven't spoken to their line manager for weeks on end and have heard nothing at all from their senior leaders. In usual circumstances this may be okay because you have access to lots of other people...in the kitchen or in the canteen and you can get a sense of what is going on but with everyone who can work at home being told they now have to again, these "water cooler" conversations will stop.

This is the time to be human; to check in more often to share information and get a sense for how everyone is feeling. It doesn't matter if the dog joins in or the child wants to say hello...this is the reality we are living in. Life is up in the air and we need to know someone has got our back. So, ring every day, hold weekly meetings for your team, have weekly company briefings hosted by your CEO and/or senior leaders and encourage community groups.

One of Lucy's guests commented on how particular groups had come together; not put in place by the business but had come together organically...the Dog Owner's Club; the Home-schooling Parents Club; the I Live on my Own Club; to name a few. And their CEO, who is sitting in his living room every Friday afternoon with 8000 people logged in for a virtual briefing. All these have brought a greater sense of community within that business and created unprecedented support which would otherwise have not happened.

When this has all settled down and people are confident to be looking for new roles again, the burning question for potential new employers should be "how did you look after your employees through the pandemic?" How will you answer?

Being Kind

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 13 Oct 2020 11:32:18 GMT

I had to take some proper time out this weekend because I was mentally exhausted. I'd had a really busy week, which is fabulous, but every meeting I had was virtual with the exception of one on Friday afternoon...and living in the virtual world is more tiring than living in the physical one.

I've followed the debate around flexible working for many years, wondering where the reluctance comes from to enable people to be more flexible with their working hours and location. And then on 23 March 2020, suddenly businesses had no choice and mostly people proved it could be done.

It was exciting at first; mornings didn't have to be quite as early, there was no long, slow commute and we only had to dress our top halves! But for many that shiny new way of working started to lose it's sheen.

It is tiring interacting enthusiastically through your laptop all day particularly when you add in the mix catching up with friends and family virtually in the evenings. It's just not how humans function best. In the office environment, we would not be sitting in front of our screens all day (no matter how unsociable you are)...in fact the Health & Safety Executive (HSE), advise strongly against it. Remember how annoying it used to be when you were in the middle of something and someone "just popped in" to see you? That's a distraction and a good one! Remember going to grab a coffee and catching up with someone in the queue who you hadn't seen since the weekend? And phone calls without video? I miss them all.

But how do we factor these distractions into our day? Well, I'm working on figuring that out! Everyone who can work from home is and we're spending all our time on Zoom or Teams or WebEx and it's not good for us.

Just writing this blog down using pen and paper before posting has rested my brain from the virtual world for a moment. I've re-arranged a few virtual meetings to be face to face and I've given myself permission to not be glued to my screen all day; to create my own change in scenery in an effort to reset my virtual brain and I will always have lunch from now on...at lunchtime, away from my office!

Now, I work for myself so I have control over all these things...I'm appealing to leaders to consider the day your team might be having. If they are in back to back virtual meetings, maybe don't squeeze in another one at the very beginning or end of the day, because you'll know how exhausting this is because your bosses are doing the same.

I do hope the revelation about being able to get a job done anywhere withstands after the pandemic, but I hope it is with greater flexibility. A few days a week at home working, is very different to doing it every day, all day for weeks. A lot of us are currently living at work and I'm pretty sure this isn't healthy.

Be kind, to yourself and to others. I'm off to have lunch.

Human Behaviour is complicated

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 29 Sep 2020 15:55:19 GMT

I was watching Loose Women today; don't judge me please! The women hosting were debating whether some of the new rules implemented by the government were too strict or not strict enough. Each of them had a different opinion and they had to agree to disagree to move on. The nation is definitely split...read any feed on any social media site.

Because we all judge risk very differently, it's easy to understand why. An article in Psychology Today, written by John Elder Robinson, really helps to put this into perspective. He states:

"With every passing day, the gulf between the view of those able to work from home and the views of those doing essential work broadens. From the formers perspective, home is safe and everything outside of that is a potential deadly threat. For the essential worker, the world is the same, but there is a virus we must be mindful of"

This rings so true. A friend of mine is a school principal and she knows the guidelines inside out. She has made sure she knows the guidelines inside out so her staff and students can return to school and have a safe and more "normal" experience of education. Yes, there are rules about wearing masks in corridors, staggered start and finish times and bubbles but their world hasn't dramatically changed - her teachers are still teaching and her students are still learning. She is an essential worker.

My world on the other hand couldn't look more different to how it did nine months ago. Every single professional interaction I have with people is virtual; I am in my house all day. And when I do get to see people there's a time limit on how long we can be together. I am not an essential worker even if I'd like to think I am!

This is how business works too (when there is no pandemic). You and your leadership team will make the best choices based on the information you have and your sense of risk. What might be seen as a crisis in the boardroom is most likely not noticed on the frontline or considered business as usual.

And of course, there is trust. The government are our leadership team on a national scale. Advice and guidance has changed fairly regularly over the last few months and there are a number of examples where those working with or in the government, have not followed the guidance. So, if they aren't behaving in a certain way, why should we?

I appreciate it is much easier to tell someone else what they should be doing than it is to make the best choices for ourselves...but whether behaviours are role modelled or not your team will follow your lead.

The impact of poor leadership

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 16 Sep 2020 11:46:15 GMT

This week has been a real mix of emotions for me. My daughter has officially started at college and she is full of excitement and energy. She is delighted to be treated like the young adult she is and I could not be happier to see her so revitalised.

However, I am also feeling frustrated and undervalued by a particular client I work for. Technically, I am an employee of this particular organisation and they appear to not care at all about me, or indeed anyone else in the team.

Because a process hasn't been followed, I am immediately unable to continue working for them. This would have been okay if conversations had been had and notice given...but nothing. A five minute conversation on Monday and I am no longer an employee. I feel as if my contribution over the last 18 months has been completely worthless and I have added no value.

It's never been straightforward working there; there is lots of red tape on the one hand and lots of ambiguity on the other. Communication isn't ever really clear and there are huge expectations on the team in terms of additional work which is unpaid. But I was only working one day a week and I enjoyed spending time with my group of learners, so I sucked it up!

Now I feel incredibly let down. I will get over this feeling, I know, and I'm pretty sure the organisation neither cares nor notices the impact on me but I will never work for them again, I will never recommend them to anyone as a good employer or supplier and I will strongly advise my friends and colleagues against contracting with them.

This is a prime example of poor leadership - processes haven't been followed, conversations haven't been had and no thought or care has been given to those affected...by anyone.

There are always times, no more so than now, when a situation is tricky, uncomfortable or tough. But, there is never a time when these situations shouldn't be handled with respect and care.

Leaders, please consider the impact and effect of your actions on others. Think about how you are going to communicate what is going on and how often. What conversations do you need to have with people in your team? If there is a process, familiarise yourself with it so you can answer the questions you may get.

And finally, remember we are all human and even the most confident and resilient amongst us will be affected if we are not treated well.

When Trust is Broken

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 25 Aug 2020 12:55:53 GMT

A connection of mine shared on LinkedIn, the shocking figures around how some organisations had been claiming salaries via the furlough scheme while still expecting employees to work. According to the research, 63% of employees have carried out work for their organisations and some of them didn't even know their salaries were being paid for using the scheme.

Being an independent consultant, I know of so many individuals who have really struggled, and are still struggling, to keep their heads above water during the pandemic. This is fraud and it makes me really angry.

What would you do if you found out your company directors had knowingly done this? Would you leave and search for another role? Would you ignore it and carry on as normal? Would you be brave enough to report them? Would you still trust them?

I talk a lot about trust; believing it is the fundamental foundation for any relationship and more specifically for leaders and their teams. If you trust your leader, that means you believe they are doing the right thing, even when no-one is watching...and claiming salaries via the furlough scheme while keeping everyone working is definitely not doing the right thing.

If I was still working in the corporate world, and I hadn't known what was happening, I would lose trust in my company immediately and start to wonder what other underhand methods were being used to keep the business going.

I would definitely have a conversation with my boss about it and most likely start looking for another role immediately. How could I ever believe anything I was told from that point forward? It would make me feel anxious and unsettled and uneasy about working there. But would I report it? Probably - when I had a new role to go to. Does that bring my integrity into question? Possibly and I would have to have that battle with myself if I ever found myself in that position.

If I knew I had been furloughed and was being asked to work, I would argue the rules and state my case with confidence I was doing the right thing - but then I have always been opinionated and able to express my views!

I understand how difficult the last six months have been for a lot of businesses and how difficult it's likely to be for the foreseeable but this is not acceptable and an incredibly short term view. Over the coming months it is very likely these businesses will be revealed in the media and would you want to work for them then? How damaging would this be to their reputation? If a role was advertised, would you apply?

"Trust arrives on foot but leaves in a Ferrari" Mark Carney, 2008. I couldn't agree more.

Leading Virtually

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Wed, 05 Aug 2020 14:59:29 GMT

If you look after a team who normally work altogether, are you leading them any differently if they are now working remotely? Some of the time or all of the time?

Sales leaders have been leading virtually for centuries...well, maybe decades! So, it's second nature to them, but in my experience, even sales teams appreciate interaction with each other from time to time.

I would suggest following the same rules as you have in the past - regular 121s, team meetings and informal chats; you just need to ramp it up, which makes meeting virtually more emotionally and mentally draining than meeting face to face.

The biggest challenge is eye contact. People's videos don't appear where the camera is, so if you look at the person speaking, they think you're looking somewhere else. If you look at the camera, then you miss all the usual cues you would get when talking face to face! This makes virtual connection hard work!

How do you solve this? Imagine yourself in front of a room filled with 50 people. You can't maintain eye contact with them all at the same time so you move your eyes around the room constantly giving the impression you are. Do the same when meeting virtually - it'll be less exhausting trying to do one or the other and your team will get the impression you are looking at them at least some of the time.

When meeting virtually, there is also the temptation to get straight down to business - we've all been told virtual interactions should be shorter and this is true. Our concentration levels are lower in the virtual world. But, would you ever start a meeting face to face exactly on the minute? Would you spend 2, 3, 5 minutes checking in and making sure everyone is okay? Talk about anything but work and/or the meeting? I'm sure you would, so allow time virtually too. And if it is really important to spend exactly an hour in the meeting online, schedule a "coffee chat" where everyone can join and you all catch up...it'll make a difference; particularly if you have new people joining the team who have never met face to face.

And finally, (for now), resist the temptation to fill your diary with back to back meetings. Sometimes it might be unavoidable but be careful not to do it every day. Even face to face you probably have to move from one meeting room to the next and those few minutes can be invaluable. That's where the temptation comes in, we don't have to move rooms virtually so we forget to add in time to make a cup of tea, pop to the loo, check on the kids, have lunch, process what has been discussed at the last meeting...

Meeting virtually is exhausting in a different way to face to face...and after 6 meetings, all one after the other, you're in no fit state to make good decisions and/or be productive...the last meeting will always feel like the last one you used to have on a Friday afternoon...regardless of the day!

We might be using technology more but we are still human and human's need time to think, refuel and prepare.

Flexing your leadership

Thu, 16 Jul 2020 11:02:18 GMT

We adopted our cat, Chester, from the RSPCA in May 2019. He'd been living on the streets for a while and had been bought in due to an infected back paw. The whole leg was amputated as this is supposedly better for cat mobility, so he is now a "tripod cat". This all happened within a month of his rescue, so coming to live in a new house with new people was daunting for him.

He spent the first month living in our spare room and then the next month under my bed, only venturing out when tempted with the prospect of food! Today, he is the master of the house and the garden and he always sleeps by my side, waking me up for breakfast every morning with a soft meow.

Watching him yesterday, it made me think about leadership and how important it is to build trust with individuals to get the best out of them.

If we hadn't let Chester get used to his environment and his new disability, I doubt he would be as comfortable today at home as he is. But, we wanted him to be a happy cat who was part of the family, so our expectations were clear.

By allowing him time to settle in and find his feet, to suss out whether we were a danger to him and discover he got fed regularly he started to feel at home. This is the same as a new team member or if you take over a team from someone else. The people in that team will need to trust you are not a threat to them and will give them the time they need to get used to you and your ways. For some, this will be instant; for others it could take months.

Regular recognition and appreciation is also key along with boundaries around what is acceptable. Being consistent in this is important and will help you to build the trust you need to get the best out of your team.

Chester isn't our first cat, in fact, I've had cats at home for over 30 years and would consider myself pretty cat savvy, but he has a very different personality to the others. This means I, and my daughter, have had to adapt how we behave around him. So, no matter how accomplished you feel as a leader, you will have to change your approach every time you interact with someone in your team, because humans are all different too.

The importance of trust

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Thu, 25 Jun 2020 13:12:54 GMT

I read an article last week about PricewaterhouseCoopers (PwC), introducing a piece of software to monitor their employees while working at home. The software is designed to prevent insider trading and potential fraud which is important in the financial world. But, my first thought was "trust alert"!

How many managers will misuse the software to monitor their teams full stop? To make sure they aren't making too many cups of tea or leaving their laptops for too long? I would suggest the temptation will be tricky for some managers to resist.

If lockdown has taught us anything, shouldn't it be we CAN trust people to manage their workload? That output is more important than input? There's a quote doing the rounds on social media, something along the lines of:

"Manager 1 - How do I measure what my team are doing if they are all working at home?

Manager 2 - Is the work getting done?

Manager 1 - Yes

Manager 2 - Then that's how you measure your teams work."

People have been delivering everything they need to, despite having to home-school, entertain young children, the dog, their partners - that's amazing! And we've had a taste of flexible working with no commute (I have not missed the motorway at rush hour, that's for sure!)

But, we have leaders who don't know how to lead in this situation...it's all new and they are praying for everything to go back to pre-lockdown normality. Some (not all) businesses have worked in a culture of presenteeism, being on time and scheduled breaks for a very long time. How can they adapt to flexible working when they don't have to anymore?

It's going to be hard but if the pandemic has given us anything positive, it is the fact we can adapt and adapt quickly. I've read stories of CEOs and senior leaders realising their teams will still work when they are not in sight and deliver better thought through work because they have less distractions from colleagues...hallelujah!

Trust is so important if you lead people, but it has to be two way. People who work for PwC probably trust the business will look after them so PwC need to trust their teams will follow whatever guidelines have been set out without the need for software.

Isn't this time an opportunity to change our habits?

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Tue, 02 Jun 2020 10:30:54 GMT

I went to the virtual pub a few weeks ago to celebrate one of my friends 50th birthday. It was as lovely as it could be and we had some great conversations and lots of wine! My favourite was sharing our Zoom experiences...of course including the many YouTube clips of people forgetting to turn their cameras off!

And then I heard something which surprised and disappointed me. One of the group shared a conversation she had had with one of her team members. The woman was trying to work from home with her three year old son who took great delight introducing himself every time Mum was on a video call. He would appear regularly "distracting everyone and disrupting the agenda" (her words not mine). She spoke to the Mum after a few calls and told her not to bother coming onto them if she couldn't keep her son away for the duration.

Now, any of you reading this with children will know how nigh on impossible a request this is.

I wonder how that Mum felt? She is already trying to work in very difficult circumstances and we all need flexibility from our leaders right now. It would send me into a spin of anxiety around my ability to do my job that's for sure.

Isn't this time an opportunity to understand a little more about our teams? To open the window a bit further and appreciate each others challenges?

Anything you read about managing a virtual team suggests you spend time to talk to each other about anything but work before getting down to business.

I know there are a lot of hopeful people out there wishing for this more flexible way of working to continue. Some companies will have already been doing it brilliantly and some will have had a light bulb moment over the last few months. Others will try hard to go back to the way it has always been and I really hope this isn't the case but after Friday's conversation, I'm not convinced.

Circles of Control

183:823942328 (Kate Stranks) — Thu, 07 May 2020 11:53:21 GMT

There's been a lot in the news and across social media recently asking whether you would report your neighbours for not following social distancing rules. This made me think about Stephen Covey's Circles of Influence and Control and how it might work in this instance.

In the work environment as a leader, I can certainly influence how other leaders behave but I can't control their behaviour. I can only control my own.

I'm sure you have all experienced a member of your team telling you about what another team has been allowed to do. You have two choices; work out if it's possible for you to do the same or explain why it isn't. I always remember as a child when I compared what I was allowed to do with my friends, my Mum replied she wasn't their parent and therefore her rules and/or boundaires didn't apply to them but they did to me!

Now, I'm not suggesting as a leader you would be that straightforward but it does have some merit. If you are spending your time worrying about how everyone else is leading, then you are wasting energy you should be using on making sure you and your team are well.

When I studied Covey's Seven Habits, this was the one habit which really stood out for me and helped me understand what I should and shouldn't be using my energy for. I can only control myself and have to work out how to influence others.

So, would I report my neighbours? No.

I don't know their circumstances or reasons why they might be having visitors or going out more regularly than us. Can and should I follow the rules? Absolutely.

Next time you see or hear about a leader doing something differently, ask yourself "can I control it?"

If the answer is no (and it should be), can you influence it? If the answer is maybe, have a conversation with them to understand their reasons why. If you can't influence them, leave well alone and concentrate your energy on looking after you and your team.

Leadership right now

Thu, 09 Apr 2020 12:15:41 GMT

I attended the Growth through People conference last week, run by Greater Birmingham Chamber of Commerce. They did a brilliant job hosting the event online and it was really worth my time.

They asked the question "what is the top leadership skill required at this time?" Overwhelmingly the response was open communication - regular contact with team members, honest conversations about the company and performance, checking wellbeing and clarity around the decisions being made. All of this I wholeheartedly agree with...but a great leader will have been doing all of these before the crisis hit and they will continue to do so.

However, for some, using these skills will be a new experience. Suddenly their team is not in front of them and a brief "hello" or "good morning" won't be enough. Well, it never really has been, but right now? Even more so.

There is lots of advice on social media about looking after a team when working remotely; if you Google it, they all pretty much share the same advice:

- Communicate a lot

- Use technology

- Manage expectations

- Focus on outcomes, not activity

- Be flexible etc, etc

I would add a few:

Look after yourself, it isn't selfish; if you are emotionally drained or exhausted, you can't look after anyone else
Let the team find solutions to the challenges your business is facing
REALLY make sure everyone is alright. You may only have verbal cues at the moment and "I'm fine" quite often means "I'm not fine"
Use this time to form new habits you can continue to develop when we are all allowed out again. Practice, experiment and find what works best for you and your team.

This is a rare opportunity where day to day tasks may not be getting in the way of you reflecting on who you are as a leader...use it wisely!

It's okay to be vulnerable

Thu, 19 Mar 2020 13:09:52 GMT

It's taken me a while to work out what to write about this month because our lives have changed so dramatically over the last few weeks. Then last night, it was announced schools were closing and all exams would be cancelled. This means my daughter's last ever day at school will be tomorrow (20 March 2020), and she is distraught.

She feels all her hard work over the last few years has been for nothing and she is worried about her friendships as well. All of the students in her friendship group are attending various sixth forms and colleges from September, but no-one is going to the one where she has her place. Her world has been turned upside down by eight words; "all exams in May and June are cancelled". Everything has changed for her in an instant.

Of course, I am doing my job as Mum to reassure her about exams, grades and friendships. I've even made suggestions for how to make their last day special and promised to arrange for everyone to get together when we are through the other side, but it was hard to do on top of the worries I already have and with little or no information at hand. I am feeling overwhelmed!

Whenever I talk about leadership, trust is always part of the conversation and to build trust you have to show vulnerability. This means talking about your own worries and concerns and concentrating on dealing with what you can control around you with your teams. Your people will be looking to you for guidance and probably asking questions you don't know the answers to...but it's okay. Be honest, share what you can and focus on looking after you and your teams.

I have no idea what will happen with exams and grades but I do know something will happen...so I will continue to reassure and help my daughter make plans for the three months she thought she would be at school studying. And I will continue to share how I am feeling with her too, we will work this out together.

We also broke the social distancing rules this morning. I said I needed a hug and she said she needed one too...so we gave each other a hug!

How do we embrace technology as a leader?

Tue, 18 Feb 2020 13:07:10 GMT

I have been delivering a module at Coventry University over the last few months about information management and I am intrigued by the impact technology is having within businesses and therefore the changing expectations we have of our leaders.

Conversations I've had with the students and my own experience tells me businesses are struggling to keep up with the expectations we have as individuals of how technology should work and the flexibility it gives us. There are systems in place which do not interact with each other creating frustrations and less efficiencies than expected, laptops and phones are over 5 years old (ancient by tech standards) and a lot of mistrust around use.

There is definitely a disconnect between how we interact with technology individually and in the workplace. And I know why...for businesses to keep up to date with the pace of change, it would demand a huge budget and within most businesses, the boardroom is dominated by baby boomers and maybe a few generation X and we did not grow up with technology! I remember having only one computer at school and that was for special projects only! I was reading an article this morning about the future of leadership and yet they mentioned "Facebook Live". Facebook is seen as a social media tool for Mum's and Dad's so creating an online community with this wouldn't work for the future workforce. So, we have an interesting conundrum!

How do we inspire our future leaders while learning ourselves how new technology works?

Give (and take) opportunities for continuous learning. The younger generations DO know more than we do about tech!

Encourage creativity, innovation and imagination. I can't believe I'm using the phrase, but you need people to "think outside of the box", because our box is out of date

Know and understand your people. With 24/7 connectivity, there are additional pressures affecting our mental health but if we focus on output, we can offer the flexibility for people to work when and where they want

Be more flexible; your younger team members want to be more independent and not so restricted by rules. Creativity, innovation and imagination can't exist if you hold the reins too tight

Loosen up! The old fashioned corporate world is dying - slowly, but it won't exist for much longer

Work out how to be inspired. If you are willing and able to embrace new ideas and ways of working, most of your work is done

And finally, prepare yourself for the unknown. Generation Z are now arriving in the workplace and they have completely different tech experiences and expectations again!

Being a great leader...where to start?

Tue, 21 Jan 2020 13:04:19 GMT

There is an abundance of reading about how to be a great leader, all with valid theories and suggestions, but it would take a lifetime to read them all. For me, there are two fundamental behaviours without which you will struggle as a leader:

Self-awareness and

Trust

According to Daniel Goleman, self awareness forms part of your emotional intelligence, along with self management, social awareness and relationship management. I was following a comment trail on LinkedIn last week, which disputed the validity of emotional intelligence as a skill you can develop, but if you delve into Goleman's definition, I think you can.

Building self awareness means recognising your emotions and the behaviour they cause and understanding the impact of that on those around you. Knowing your triggers will help you understand your own strengths and limits which for a leader is imperative. By knowing your own limitations, you can free your mind to concentrate on your strengths allowing those around you to fill in the gaps. We don't know all the answers and we don't ever need to - there are plenty of others who will. Building our own self awareness makes us more adaptable and flexible in our approach with people in different situations. This means you can build on the relationships you have with your team, your peers and your customers...and that brings me to trust.

A good leader needs to be able to trust others and be trusted to build great relationships. Stephen Covey (Jnr), talks about "working at the speed of trust". He argues there is nothing more important for a business to be successful because it provides the basis for the agility and flexibility required in today's world of business.

Let me give you an example.

Many years ago when I started my career in the HR arena, I worked with a HR Director who I, and everyone else, trusted implicitly. He made it easy for us to work...if we needed to make changes because something wasn't working, it was our decision. If we needed his help in making the decision, he gave his help . He was considered credible and reliable by everyone, within the function and beyond. And he knew us and our strengths well. I was a new openings trainer back in those days with a million people far more important than me! So, how delighted was I when our HR Director visited me shortly after my daughter was born just for a chat and a cup of tea!

We, as a team, would have moved heaven and earth to do the right thing by him, our productivity was at it's maximum. But then he left and a new HR Director was appointed. They could not have been more different in their approach to work.

Within six months, she had restructured and made half the team redundant; decisions appeared to be made in the moment as frequently they was reversed or changed some days later and no-one in the team knew whether they were coming or going! Activity and delivery slowed down because we were unsure of what to do. Suddenly, we felt vulnerable. It felt like she didn't trust us and trusting her became increasingly difficult. So, I resigned.

If as a leader you can't build credibility (and yes, sometimes that means saying "I don't know"), you can't deliver on your promises and if you don't know (or care about), the people working with and for you, building relationships becomes almost impossible.

Be inspired to know who you are and share with others. Not being aware of the impact you have on others is a limitation, being vulnerable and trusting is not.

The impact of not trusting your people

Fri, 20 Dec 2019 12:55:02 GMT

Watching the news this week, 554 people have been exonerated of fraud against the Post Office, 34 of which were sent to prison, because managers believed the new accounting system was infallible over the integrity of their people. The system was installed 20 years ago and it is only this week it has been discovered the system was making the errors and not those using it. How does this happen? I'm guessing there was trust missing in the relationship.

So, what stops us from believing in our people and trusting them to do the right thing? Well, for some of us, we mistrust everyone until they prove their innocence and for others, we've been caught out in the past by poor behaviour or attitude. But surely, our role as leaders is to believe? Innocent until proven guilty?

Quite often, I come across policies implemented as a result of one person doing something they shouldn't...which means we spend our time managing to the lowest common denominator. What if we believed everyone will do the right thing and managed by exception?

I am fairly sure 99% of people come to work to do a good job and not to find ways to break the rules or push the boundaries too far. We are all capable of running our lives outside of the work environment; waking up on time, deciding what to wear, managing our finances and household budgets, looking after others etc...so why is it some businesses believe we all lose our common sense the minute our working day starts?

Of course, boundaries have to be set but let's treat each other like adults and trust our people. There will always be the odd "bad apple" of course and it's important they are dealt with, but not at the expense of everyone else's freedom to think for themselves.

Building trust brings great reward...creativity, innovation and willingness to put more in - everything we need from our people right now to keep our businesses successful. You might also be surprised how much more pleasant your own working day becomes!

For those accused of fraud at the Post Office? Well, £58M has been set aside for compensation. I'm not sure any amount of money could take away all the suffering caused so many years ago and still affecting those people today. This is the impact of not trusting your people.

Time to think about your impact on others

Mon, 25 Nov 2019 12:53:09 GMT

Everybody is talking about mental health and wellbeing at the moment and it is an extremely important subject. Despite the weather and my lack of enthusiasm to run this morning, I knew I had to go out because I wasn't feeling my best. So, I reluctantly put on my running gear, turned on my playlist and went for a run. And I came back more motivated with a clearer mind to turn on my laptop and get to work than I had 30 minutes earlier.

But physical activity is only a small part of creating wellbeing. I was on the train a few weeks ago and overheard a conversation between two colleagues. They were talking about their boss who, the Sunday evening before, at 7pm-ish, had sent a meeting invite for 8am the next morning. I didn't hear what the meeting was for, but one of the pair changed their travel plans, got up early and attended the meeting. The other one didn't see the late request and arrived at work at the normal time on that Monday morning, missing the meeting completely. What I did pick up was the meeting was not as urgent as to require an early Monday morning get together and with some people in the team missing, would have been much better planned for later in the day.

I appreciate everyone has their own pressures but surely as a leader we have the responsibility to not get tasks off our list at the expense of others wellbeing? The boss involved in the conversation I overheard, clearly felt a meeting was important...maybe to talk about missed targets or to share some changes happening perhaps, but to pass that pressure and worry to their team is irresponsible as a leader.

Not only would some of the team now be thinking about the early morning meeting and it's purpose for the remainder of the Sunday evening, some of the team didn't attend and were left out of whatever conversations took place. This will have had an impact on everyone's wellbeing in very different ways.

I am a big advocate of leading by example but as both colleagues agreed their boss must have had their reasons and decided it was "just the way they worked", I fear the example being set here is not a good one. When either of these two become leaders, I wonder what expectations they will set for their people? 24/7 working is acceptable? It's okay to create worry and pressure for your team in order to relieve your own?

As leaders, it is our responsibility to look after our teams' and as stated by Stephen Covey "what you do has far greater impact than what you say". Our future leaders will not behave differently if we don't change first.

Change is coming…always!

Mon, 28 Oct 2019 12:51:06 GMT

There is a lot of change happening in business at the moment (well, the world really!). With exec teams dealing with the uncertainty of what the next few years might bring, the change in how business is done with affect individuals in very different ways.

How as a leader then, regardless of your level, do you reassure the people around you? Because an organisation can't change unless its people do too.

There will be people in your team who will embrace the new way of doing things and there will be those who don't. It's your job as their leader to figure out why. The biggest reason cited for the failure of any change or transformation is people's resistance; because they don't agree with it; don't like it or don't understand it.

Firstly, make sure you have come to terms with whatever is happening. It is incredibly difficult to influence others to do something different when you don't believe yourself. Find the part that flicks your switch. Once you are able to believe in the benefits, your team are far more likely to believe with you.

Next step is to tell everyone together; this keep the message clean and reduces the risk of people creating their own versions to be told by the coffee machine or in the smoking shelter. As human beings, we like to fill in the gaps if people's stories are different.

And finally, spend time with each of your team on their own...regularly! Understand what they are feeling - excited? fearful? cynical? Answer what questions you can and promise answers for those you can't. Help your team to find their own connection with what is happening and what's in it for them. This is your opportunity to put your coaching skill to good use.

Most change involves a new process of some kind and it's probably an excellent one. Well thought through with key people's input; but if your team don't understand their part in it, it's likely in a few months time you'll be looking back and wondering why the wonderful new way of working hasn't delivered what was expected and/or people are still working the way they always have.

People make work, work. Not processes. Making sure your team understand what got us here, probably won't get us there will stand you in good stead for making any change happen...big or small.

Why leaders should be thinking differently

Mon, 30 Sep 2019 11:48:54 GMT

On Friday last week, I watched a TED Talk by Elizabeth Lyle about breaking bad management habits. It really resonated with me and seemed to answer the question from my last blog. I asked why it was taking so long for leaders to change their behaviour to keep up with the ever-changing demands of their employees and customers.

Elizabeth says our future leaders are inheriting bad habits from their own leaders. I'm sure you will all have experienced the silence in a meeting when someone challenges the way we do things around here...or the instant barrage of disagreement, meaning only the very brave will challenge again?!

Organisational psychologists have identified shared leadership as key to creating high performance leading to success in achieving goals and offering psychological safety when challenges and barriers happen.

To truly share leadership however, I believe there are a couple of things our leaders need to let go of first:

(1) the notion you need to be an expert in all areas within your function. Sure, you need a vision and a purpose, but how they are achieved need not sit only in your hands

(2) believing "that's how we have always done things around here". Be brave and challenge the norm - what's the worst that can happen?

(3) believing no-one can do a task better than you! Maybe they can't, but if the outcome needed is clearly defined, does it matter if they do it differently? And if you never empower your team to think for themselves, they will never learn how to.

Changing mindset is hard, we all know that, particularly when what you have been doing has worked for you so far. But sometimes, what got you here, won't get you there and to paraphrase Elizabeth Lyle, without changing how you lead now, you may not be fit to lead the organisations in the future.

If you'd like to listen to Elizabeth Lyle's TED Talk follow the link below:

https://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_lyle_how_to_break_bad_management_habits_before_they_reach_the_next_generation_of_leaders

Are leaders born or created?

Mon, 09 Sep 2019 11:46:29 GMT

We all know the world of business is changing, not just for the customer in terms of service and convenience but for the people who work in them. The companies who have embraced the changes appear to be more successful than those who aren’t.

Gone are the days when “top-down” bureaucracy is what people want…most (and I mean most, not all) want to be treated as adults. Perfectly able to stand on their own two feet outside of the work environment, they want to be given the freedom to think for themselves and make their own decisions inside the work environment.

Now, I agree, there has to be some boundaries – there are in every aspect of a person’s life, but not so much so work feels like entering a dictatorial society!

Where am I going with this? Well, if the way we do business is changing, then the way we lead has to change…but I don’t think it is happening fast enough. I am part of a number of HR and L&D groups and still see questions asking “how do I get my CEO on board with the value of training?” or “does anyone have a policy about the rules of working from home? My CEO wants to make sure people are still doing work”

If the leaders of these businesses trusted their people to ask for relevant development or focussed on output not presenteeism, then these questions will soon no longer need asking.

So, what needs to happen? We need better leaders in our businesses. Leaders who are prepared to commit to deliberate practice and training to develop their emotional intelligence (EQ).

Some research suggests individuals with a high EQ make better leaders – they understand themselves and the impact they have on those around them, they can make better decisions because their emotions are under control and they are willing to look at themselves honestly knowing when to use criticism to improve their performance. These leaders trust their people to do the right thing and know exactly how to have the conversation if they don’t.

All of this will come more naturally to some than others, but we can all learn to behave differently…we’ve been doing it all our lives. When we started school, we had to learn to listen and concentrate for a much longer period of time, we learnt how to study, how to drive safely, how to make friends…and keep them!

What stops us when we get into a leadership position? I think fear. Fear of losing control, of getting it wrong, of appearing soft – there are a million and one reasons.

Are leaders born or created? Both – if we’re willing to learn new ways of doing things, prepared to practice, practice, practice and to take accountability for ourselves.

Why are difficult conversations so difficult?

Thu, 15 Aug 2019 11:42:29 GMT

I've had a couple of meetings recently with people who have noticed the difficulty their managers have with conversations around performance. So I started thinking about why these types of conversations are so hard. My conclusions are, as human beings, we have a fear of upsetting others and/or we have a fear of the how the other person will react.

But, there a coping strategies to making sure these conversations go well...

(1) Stop using the phrase "can I give you some feedback?" The word "feedback" has gained itself a pretty poor reputation over the years and is likely to strike fear instantly for most people, causing them to go on the defensive. Instead, just say what needs to be said as part of a conversation. This takes away the fear from both sides.

(2) Make the conversation timely. I've had bosses in the past who have held onto feedback until review time. Firstly, I probably haven't been able to remember the occasion and secondly, it's a complete surprise, which for me does not bode well!

(3) Make sure it's based on facts. This means the other person knows exactly what to fix. I'm sure you've been given vague feedback in the past which you can do nothing with?

(4) Make sure the conversation is based around something you have seen, heard or experienced, not on what someone else has told you. Why? Well, you need to be able to tell the other person the impact the situation is having on you...if it's third hand you can't do this. And the other person cannot argue with how you are feeling, they are what they are and can never be disputed.

(5) Agree what is going to be different at the end of your conversation. This makes sure the other person takes ownership of what has been said and the action to put it right.

(6) Notice the good stuff too. This will build up the emotional bank account and means any conversation you do need to have around performance is taken with good intent and trusted. Please avoid the "feedback sandwich" A model, which was popular about 30 years ago, it's premise is to surround feedback for improvements with feedback that is good. But it takes away the value of the good stuff.

Here's why...

Disneyland pay a lot of attention to making sure their world of fantasy is as perfect the next day as it was the day before. Scuffed walls are repainted, bins are always empty and characters are never allowed to take off their costumes in public. This would ruin the magic. However, in the early days, customer satisfaction was lower than they expected. When they investigated, it turned out people were having real trouble finding their cars at the end of the day. And that's what was being remembered; not the wonder or the magic in the park. Being British, most of us remember the bad before we'll even consider the good. Which is why the feedback sandwich doesn't work - I would suggest it's for the benefit of the giver rather than the receiver, to make them feel better about the conversation.

And finally, reframe your fear of how the other person might react. You only have control over what you do and if you've delivered your feedback well, 9 times out of 10 the reaction will never be as bad as your imagination made you think.

Should a Coach ever give advice?

Tue, 30 Jul 2019 11:38:08 GMT

Last week I ran the final session of coaching skills with Hansgrohe UK. While the group now understood how asking great questions could help them in their every day, and a number of opportunities to practice, questions like "do you think you could..." and "have you thought about..." still appeared in their conversations.

At the weekend, I was sharing this with a friend who also works in the world of learning and development. Her response surprised me! "I hate being coached...all those questions? It's exhausting! My coach always offers advice"

I suggested maybe her coach wasn't asking good enough questions and really shouldn't be giving her advice. "Not these days" she replied, "Even some coaching qualifications encourage you to step out of coach role during the conversation to offer advice"

My argument would be if you need to offer advice, then the conversation is not right for coaching in the first place or you've ended up somewhere which needs to be parked and revisited in a separate conversation. When I am asked "what would you do?", I ask a question back...who do you know who does this really well? or "if you were talking to a friend, what would you say?" or "who does this really well? What/how do they do (it)?"

At a networking session I attended, one of the members shared a great push back she had experienced with her own coach. "Do you want to learn from me or do you want to learn from you?" I love this approach...

I am a coaching purist! Coaching is all about helping people think situations through, usually from an emotional perspective. But it can only be used in the right situations. Trying to coach someone who doesn't know how a system works or who is responsible for a particular part of a process won't work. If they don't know, they don't know and no amount of coaching will help find the answer (although you could start with "how could you find out?" maybe).

The group I was training had never experienced coaching - the thought of not having to know the answer was completely alien to them. The hard work and practice has only just begun for them to become fabulous coaches. I'm revisiting in six months to see how well they are doing...I can't wait!

When bias gets in the way

Fri, 19 Jul 2019 11:34:43 GMT

I was on the train home from Birmingham last week. It was the middle of the day so there weren't many passengers. As I sat gathering my thoughts about the meeting I had been in, three (not very well dressed) men entered the carriage. Two sat down and the other started to pace up and down having a conversation with himself.

I immediately pulled my bag closer and started to think about how I could exit the carriage if I needed to...my bias kicked in and I felt vulnerable.

As we pulled into the next station, one of the seated men stood up and headed to the door; "Come on Dad" he called. In my "I feel vulnerable" state of mind, I hadn't noticed their ages or the Dad engrossed in his newspaper.

My bias had clouded my mind and I had completely misjudged the situation. With a sigh of relief, I told myself off and relaxed a little into my seat.

But what about the other man who had been pacing, chatting to himself? About 3 seconds after telling myself off, he sat down in the seat across the aisle from me - very quickly, my bias had returned and I felt vulnerable again!

At the same station, a young man in a wheelchair got onto the train and the man I was uncomfortable with started a conversation with him. They spoke about the difficulties of travelling on public transport, the injuries preventing the man from walking at the moment and how well he was responding to physio. My biased thoughts had again been proved wrong.

I have run many sessions over the years about unconscious bias to raise awareness in how it can impact the decision making process and yet here I was letting it influence how I was feeling.

My conclusion? No matter how aware you are of your biases, conscious or otherwise, they will always play a part in how you think. The important thing is to recognise what's happening quickly enough so a clearer decision can be made.

So, I joined in the conversation and didn't feel vulnerable anymore.

Does Learning still belong in the Classroom?

Tue, 16 Jul 2019 11:33:42 GMT

With all the technology we now have available to us, is there a need for classroom based training in the workplace? I recently fitted new door handles with the help of YouTube and learnt how to create IF formulae in Excel by using Google and Microsoft. But could I become a better influencer, communicator or coach? I'm not sure.

This is where the classroom comes into it's own. It provides a safe place to take those first steps to becoming proficient - particularly if it's a behavioural skill. But, according to research, it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become a master which means a number of other things need to be in place.

Firstly, line managers need to give their support. This means being clear about what needs to be different before attending training, not interrupting with "emergencies" during the training and giving time with patience after the event for practice, mistakes, follow up and reinforcement.

The learner has a responsibility to enter the room with an open mind and belief they will learn something new with the promise to themselves to try out and practice their new knowledge or skill.

And the trainer or facilitator has an obligation to make sure whatever is presented is applicable and relatable after leaving the classroom. The session needs to have time for reflection and practice - not be crammed full with model after model in the hope something will spark for someone.

Discussion holds great value too. It's not often we get the opportunity to spend time with people outside of our own department. Discussion brings richness to the learning, challenging each others' interpretation and starting to build different relationships across the business.

But most of all, it's about practice and that needs a learning culture, where it's okay to try new things, make mistakes and strive to be better than yesterday. Could I read a book the first time I picked one up? Definitely not - if I recall correctly, it took about 5 years of practice at school and at home - sometimes painful for me, my teachers and my parents no doubt! Sometimes, I Google words today because I don't know what they mean...but I wouldn't be able to if it hadn't have been for the interaction I had with others, the desire to learn, the right environment and years of practice.

So yes, "some" learning belongs in the classroom...but it won't build skills on it's own.